Trusting You
by KaiaLuna
Summary: Alice reveals a secret setting two people on the path destiny designed but old lovers threaten the mates faith. Bella trusted her with everything once, can she trust her with him?
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer – I do not own Twilight. All recognizable plot and characters belong to the talented Stephanie Meyer.**

**I had a good response to Big Bad Wolf so I thought I'd post the other few stories I have lying around in my writing folder that I was unsure of. Hope you all enjoy.**

**This one is a bit different than my normal focus on the wolves. It picks up at the hotel with Jasper and Alice just before James calls.**

**Please review!**

"Alice?" I looked worriedly over at my best friend.

"You need to leave." She said turning to me.

"What? Alice what's going on? What did you see?"

"Alice?" Jasper asked coming into the room.

"You need to take her Jazz. Take her to Peter. Leave everything and go now."

"Alice what's going on?" I was starting to get frantic. "Has James found us?"

"Yes."

Jasper growled and they began talking to low and quickly for me to understand or even hear more than a low buzz.

"Alice?" he sighed.

"I know Jazz. Please trust me. It has to be like this."

He pulled her into his arms and they embraced. Alice kissed him and then he was gone.

"Jazz is gone to get an SUV. Come on I'll walk you to the front."

"What's going on Alice? James found us? Are you sure? Are the others alright?"

"Everyone is fine Bella. Jazz is going to take you somewhere safe. I need you to trust him ok."

"Of course I trust him, I trust both of you. If you say we need to go, I'll put my things in a bag. Should we call Edward?"

"No. Jazz will get you all you need when you get there."

"When we get there you mean."

"No Bella. I'm not coming with you."

"You have to Alice. We can't just leave you behind."

Suddenly I was in her cold embrace, "I love you so much Bella. You know that."

I nodded, "Of course, I love you to Alice."

"I need you to trust me. Go away with Jazz. Stay with him."

"I do. I will. But what about you?"

"I can't come with you now." She held me a little tighter, "You take care of Jazz for me ok Bella."

"We'll see you soon though right? You and Edward and the others?"

"You'll see us again. I promise. But its not going to be for a long time."

"Alice?"

"I need to tell you something. I know its going to be hard and I should have told you a long time ago but I couldn't I was selfish."

"Alice?"

"Edward isn't your mate."

"Alice, what are you talking about?"

"I saw you Bella. I saw you a long time ago. Long before we ever met you and I knew you would be a part of our lives and we would all love you. Things changed though, over time, decisions were made and so much happened but you were always meant to be with us Bella."

"Alice…"

"I love him Bella, I loved him for over half a century, it was harder than I thought, when the end came but I should have told you, told him, told Edward and I didn't."

"Alice?" I couldn't understand what she was saying, I was always meant for their family but Edward wasn't my mate.

"Jasper is your mate."

"Alice no. He's"

"He's not my mate Bella. He never was. We love each other but it's time to let go. I should have let him go before you ever came into our lives but I was selfish and then you and Edward and I thought why can't I keep him, just a little longer, but I can't, you belong together and one way or another it was going to happen. I knew that. I just wanted him a little longer. And I knew, I knew we would be best friends Bella, I swear that I love you; I want what's best for you. I love you. I love you both so you have to listen to me. You have to go. He'll keep you safe. Trust him Bella, trust him and love him."

"Alice this is crazy." Tears were streaming down my face now and I could see the venom welling in hers, "I love Edward and Jasper loves you."

"Yes but he will love you so much more and you will you love him. Its amazing Bella, your future together, but if you don't go with him now it wont happen, things will be bad Bella, real bad. People will die." She was sobbing now, "I should have seen this, I should have known this was a possibility and never allowed you and Edward. I'm so sorry Bella. One day you will forgive me."

"Alice,"

"Listen to me, ok, we only have a few more minutes before you need to go down and meet Jazz. I love you. I love you so much and I need you to trust me ok?"

I nodded and she continued, "Jazz doesn't know but he will, he'll recognize you as his mate soon, it was going to be soon anyway, your eighteenth birthday actually, it would take you longer but not much, but that's changed now. I had to tell you and Jazz will find out for himself, we can't tell him Bella, it will change things, let him tell you, understand?"

"Alice, I…" I just nodded, wiping at the tears on my face.

"Jazz is going to take you away, keep you safe. You'll be gone for a few years. But I will see you again. Trust him ok, listen to him and this is really important ok, I need you to promise me this one thing ok Bella?"

Her eyes were burning into me as I nodded again, "You are leaving everything here. Including your cell phone. I am going to go after this and stage an accident. From this day, Bella Swan is dead. You can never contact your family again."

The tears started harder again, "I'm sorry Bella. You were supposed to have another year with them but it needs to happen this way now. Ok?"

I nodded into her shoulder, "You can also not call any of the Cullen's."

I stood back looking at her in confusion.

"They'll know you are alive and that Jazz has you. Edward will be furious at first but Bella he can't know where you are. You cannot contact him. I promise he will be safe. Happy even."

She seemed to hesitate, "Alice?"

"He'll meet his true mate Bella."

I stepped back stunned, pain shooting into my heart.

"I'm sorry Bella, but you have to understand. He loves you, he does, so much but you aren't meant for each other, you are meant for Jazz."

"What about you?"

"My mate is out there. One day I'll meet him."

"The others?"

"I'm sorry Bella. Jazz will contact Carlisle a couple times, he and Esme will want to speak with you and Emmett will do his best to speak with you as well, you have to say no. You especially cannot talk to Edward. You will speak with Carlisle once, just tell him you are safe and you want to stay with Jazz, nothing else, ok?" I nod starting to feel numb.

"I love you Bella. Remember that." She pulled me to her again, "I'll see you again sister."

"I love you to Alice." I told her, my mind unable to process all she had said.

"We have to go now, Jazz will have the SUV parked under the awning." I heard my cell phone ring as she ushered me out of the room.

We hugged again in the lobby before she led me out to where Jazz waited in a black range rover. She opened the door and helped me into the seat, talking to Jazz in the same, to fast and low for human ears way, while I buckled.

"I'll be in touch. I love you both." She said slamming the door.

Jasper shifted gears and we drove away in silence. I felt mostly numb still but couldn't stop the tears and I silently cried. Eventually I fell into a fitful sleep.

When I woke, we were parked at a gas station and I was alone in the car. I looked around for Jasper, had he just left me here? No, Alice said we would be together, for years" I bit my lip trying not to cry again as the confusion of our conversation came back, I fought back the words and decided I would ignore them and think of something else.

"You're awake." Jasper said opening the door. He had a bag that he handed to me; "We'll get you something proper to eat after we've made a few more miles."

I nodded and took the bag, "thank you Jasper." I whispered.

Inside was a bottle of water, a bottle of coke, a sandwich, chips and a dime novel, the last one made me smile a little as I pulled it out.

"Didn't think you were much for the magazines Alice and Rose favor, they didn't have much selection but thought that one might at least make you smile."

I looked down at it again; it was one of those cheesy vampire romance novels. I let out a weak watery laugh, "thanks Jazz."

I set it in the door and pulled out my snack. I wasn't really hungry but I ate half the sandwich anyway so not to worry Jazz.

"What about you?" I asked quietly as I chewed.

"Not much for sandwiches Darlin'" he laughed. It was low and sexy; I had never heard him laugh before. Wait sexy? That must be Alice planting ideas in my head.

I blushed, "I meant…"

He shot me an odd look before smiling, "I know what you meant," he smiled before turning back to the road "I caught a deer in the woods over there before I went in to buy your food." I did notice his eyes were brighter when they met mine.

I continued to slowly eat in silence. I put the rest back in the bag and drank some of the soda before picking up the book and curling as much as I could into a comfortable position.

I tried to focus on the words instead of what Alice had said but I couldn't.

"What's gong on in that head of yours Bella? Your emotions are all over the place."

I put the book down and sat up, looking over at him, "Where are we going Jazz?"

"New Orleans."

"Why?"

"My brother and his wife are there."

"For how long?"

Jasper sighed, "Honestly I don't know Bella. Alice ain't sayin a whole lot. Then she never does. Just that I need to take you and keep you safe, not let ya outta my sight fer a while, said it'd be wise to take ya to Peter and Char and move from there."

A Southern accent was slipping out of Jazz, something I had never heard from him and it was sexy as all, "Um ok."

Jazz shot me a funny look but quickly looked back to the road, "They aren't like the Cullen's though Bella; they are human drinkers."

I felt a shiver of fear run through me.

"They wont touch you. You don't have to worry about that. They don't deny so they don't have control issues."

"Will you?"

He sighed again, "Have control issues with you or drink from humans?"

I shrugged, "either, both?"

"I'm fine here in the car with you and have been for a while. My control is much better than Edward will have let on, since he doesn't believe I have it. Saying I slip too much. I don't, I haven't slipped once, I made the decision to drink from people a few times while living with them. Carlisle was disappointed but he understands and respects my choices, I respect Carlisle and love Alice so I try to maintain their diet. Edward calls them slipups but I chose to go out and hunt, I chose my prey carefully, it was not an accident from loss of control, it was my choice and Alice understood that, the others had a harder time with it. Edward is the worst for it, he believes it is willpower and a choice to be good or not, he sees many things in black and white which I do not. Mostly I stay veggie but I indulge once in a while so yes, I will likely hunt humans on occasion and no you do not need to worry about my control."

"Is it hard, feeling what they do?" I was curious about him now. We had never really had a conversation before and with what Alice said… no, I wouldn't think about that.

"Yes and no." he sighed again, "How much do you know about me Bella? About what I can do?"

"Not much. Edward just said you were newer to the diet so you had problems with it and he said that you are an empath."

"I already explained the diet, but he said nothing of my past?"

I shook my head, "Edward wasn't big on sharing the stories of the rest of the family, he told me some about Carlisle and Esme, and how Rose saved Emmitt after a bear attack but that's it."

"I wont get into it now but did he tell you any more about my ability?"

"Not really, just that you get a sense for what people are feeling and can influence their emotions which I have also experienced."

He laughed dryly, "Yes Bella, you have felt a very small amount of my ability but I don't get a sense of what people are feeling, I can feel every emotion and if I go through them I can find the ones you hide even from yourself. I can do more than influence your emotions, I can drown you in whatever emotion I choose, and I am able to do this to many at once, picking who to influence and who not to in a good sized group."

I nodded my head, a little frightened.

"I would not hurt you Bella."

I nodded again, "I trust you."

"I know," he smiled over at me again, "I just don't know why."

I shrugged my shoulders at him, "because I know you wont hurt me."

He laughed a little and turned back to the road, "Well, having this ability to feel and change emotions, I can influence the emotions of my prey, make them feel what I want them to."

"Do you ever feel bad about it? Killing people?"

I could see his face darken as he kept his eyes on the road in front of him, "I have done many terrible things in my time Bella, things I will have to live with all my existence." His hands tightened on the wheel.

"Jasper, I'm sorry." I should not be asking him these things; it was his business what he did. He was leaving his family to keep me safe.

"Stop that right there." He demanded. "Whatever you are thinking about just stop, I told you at the hotel and I will say it again, you are worth it Bella."

I nodded and looked at my hands in my lap.

"I don't feel bad about the prey I have hunted since changing who I was when I first became a vampire. I, like Peter and Char hunt only those who are dying or who need killing."

"Need killing?" And I had just finished lecturing myself about harassing him with questions.

"Rapists, murders, pedophiles, drug dealers, basically the scum of the earth."

"Oh, well," I thought about it and was surprised that it didn't bother me in the least. I knew Edward had said he had done the same but I had rationalized it that he didn't do it anymore, he felt bad and stopped even though it was his nature. Jasper was doing so in the past and very likely the near future and it didn't bother me in the least, in fact, I couldn't help picturing him with red eyes, an avenging dark angel in the night.

"What are you thinking about?" he asked, causing me to blush.

"Nothing." I told him looking out my window.

"Bella?" his voice held a hard note of command.

"I was just thinking about what you would look like with red eyes." I told him blushing brighter.

"Does the idea bother you?"

"No." I told him honestly.

"There is no doubt in you." He mused, "Why is that?"

I blushed again, "I suppose because I would have rather my grandmother have died peacefully in her sleep, lulled by whatever sweet dreams the emotions you sent her caused instead of in pain, alone at the hospital. And the criminals, if they are so bad and irredeemable and they aren't getting caught, well then think of the people you are saving, all the people you will have avenged." I blushed again.

Jasper chuckled, "Yes. I am glad you see it so. It is a shade of gray that Edward refuses to acknowledge. Now you should try to sleep more. Lay down in the back if you like."

I nodded, and climbed over the consol into the back, I lay there and watched Jasper as he drove.

"Would you like me to help you?" he asked after a while.

"Yes, but not with your power, can you just talk to me a while?"

He turned to look at me, and gave me a smile, "Sure." He thought for a minute. "Did you know I was the youngest ever to reach the rank of Major in the civil war?"

"You were in the civil war?" I asked him.

He laughed again, "Back before I was turned. I grew up on a ranch in Texas, my parents, my older brother and my baby sister. Pa raised horses and some cattle and we helped him. It was a modest living and hard work but we loved it. Ma, she was an angel, had long blond hair down to her waist and the sweetest laugh. They are hazy in my memory but what I remember was all good things, thinking of them makes me feel warm. My brother William died when I was fourteen; he was a year older and my best friend, he died in a riding accident. My baby sister was only nine when I joined up, I never saw her again. I was only seven and a bit years older than her but I lied on my military forms, sayin I was over eighteen. I moved the ranks quicker than most and became Major at twenty-two which is a huge accomplishment, especially bein as I was barely twenty really. I was turned a year after that. Never did learn what happened to Anna Mae. She was the sweetest kid, had hair like my mothers and eyes bluer than the sky. She'd a been a heart breaker when she grew up. Always followed Will and I everywhere, she'd sneak down the hall at night and crawl in bed with us after a bad dream. When Will died, she slept with me every night. Have me sing her to sleep." His head turned around to glance at me, "I could sing ya to sleep to if you like?"

I smiled and nodded, "Please."

He began to sing, his voice low and soothing. He sang old country songs and I shut my eyes to listen to his low husky tones. He had a beautiful voice and it lulled me into a peaceful sleep.

When I woke up it was bright out and we were still driving.

"Morning Bella." Jasper said as I sat up.

"Morning Jasper." I yawned, "What time is it?"

"Eleven. You hungry?"

I nodded.

"Sun's to much out for me to stop but we'll be at Char and Peter's soon."

"I can just eat the rest of what you got last night."

He nodded, "Alright then."

I climbed back over to the passenger seat and curled my legs under me.

I ate the other half a sandwich and the bag of chips watching the scenery go by.

"Alice said Carlisle will call soon."

"You talked to Alice?"

"About an hour ago, she said not to wake you but to remind you that she loves you and all will be well if you remember what she told you though I am not allowed to ask what that is."

I blushed, "I'm sorry Jazz."

He shook his head, "Don't be Darlin, I learned long ago Alice has her reasons for things."

"She's alright though?"

"She and the others are all fine." I blushed, how had I forgotten the others? "What is it Bella?"

"I was just thinking about the others. I'm glad they are all ok."

"Well we will talk to Carlisle soon and I am sure Edward is anxious to hear from you."

I nodded and looked out the window as the sadness crept in, knowing I was not to talk to him, that I was not his mate, we would never be together; he would find someone else. My heart ached with a pain I had never known.

"Bella? I know you miss him and I'm sure you'd both prefer it be him with you, but Alice is sure this is the best way to keep you safe. Believe me she wouldn't have sent us away otherwise. I'm sure it wont be for to long."

I just nodded and bit back the tears threatening, I knew it would be for longer than he thought but I couldn't think about all this now. It was too much.

We drove in silence a little longer before the phone rang. Jasper picked it up.

"Carlisle? … No, we're fine. … Yes, Alice said … Ok, yeah, here she is."

I could only hear his side of the conversation and he gave me a strange look as he handed me the phone. My palms felt a little wet and my stomach churned, I wanted to cry again; I tried to remember what Alice had told me to say.

"Carlisle?"

"Bella" I heard relief in his voice. "Are you alright?"

"Yes, I'm fine. Jasper is keeping me safe."

I heard something on the other line and I assumed Carlisle was listening to someone else, "Sorry Bella. Edward is coming now, he's going to come meet you and take you some where safe for a while."

"No." I bit back tears, "I am safe Carlisle please don't worry, Jasper and I will be fine." Alice said we would be, that we would see them all again, even if it was a few years away.

"Bella?" I handed the phone back to Jasper; he was giving me an odd look.

"Carlisle? Alice told me to stay with Bella, to take her somewhere safe for a while."

He paused while Carlisle said something and then I heard a shout through the phone, Edward.

"NO! LET ME TALK TO HER NOW!" Jasper held the phone out to me, I wiped the tear that had escaped and shook my head at him.

"Sorry brother. I promise I will protect her."

"DAMNIT JASPER YOU PUT HER ON THE PHONE! TELL ME WHERE YOU ARE I AM COMING TO GET HER!"

I heard Jasper growl, "No."

"JASPER! YOU…" Jasper snapped the phone shut and looked over at me.

"This part of what Alice told you?"

I nodded and turned my head away to look out the window.

"She said, a while, that mean…"

I sighed, "A while, Jasper, it means we'll be gone a while."

"And you wont be talking to Eddie I take it?" I shook my head no as fresh tears fell, "And the others?" I shook my head no again and leaned my forehead against the glass.

I felt calm spread over me, "It'll be alright Bella. I'll keep you safe and as soon as she says its safe I'll bring you home."

"She's killing me Jasper, my family will all believe I died."

"Not all your family Bella." I nodded again but I knew, things would never be the same, my place with the Cullen's, the one I had so dreamed of was never to be mine, I wasn't Edwards mate.

After driving in silence for a few minutes, Jasper turned on the radio and we began talking about music. We moved on to movies after that and then books. We had a lot in common, a lot more than I had ever expected.

"We're coming up on Peter and Char's place now."

"Do they know we are coming? Did you call them while I slept?"

Jasper shook his head, "No but Peter will know."

"Does he have visions too?"

"No, he just knows shit. No one knows why or how, he just does."

"What about Charlotte, does she have a gift?"

Jasper laughs, "She puts up with my brother, that's a gift in itself."

I rolled my eyes at him, I really liked this relaxed, open Jasper, I was glad we had this chance to become friends. I swallowed as I remembered Alice saying we would be more than friends but I shook my head a little to banish the thought. I couldn't see Jasper like that. I loved Edward. But he's going to find his own mate. My broken heart reminded me.

"Bella?" Jasper snapped me out of my thoughts, "What ever Alice told you, and I get that you can't tell me because it will change shit or something but remember it is subjective, so don't worry so much about it ok? Everything is going to be fine. The family will be alright and I will keep you safe."

I nodded, "I believe you." But I also wasn't about to bet against Alice, especially since seeing him in this new light. Jasper was kind and good and funny and had a sexy laugh. I just wished he used it more.

We pulled to a stop and got out of the range rover as the front door opened, "Char baby the Major is here and he brought us a snack."

Jasper growled at him but I couldn't help it, I burst out in laughter, it was what James had said when this mess started, the Cullen's had brought a snack.

A beautiful petite blond smacked him upside the head and it reminded me so much of Emmitt and Rosalie that I laughed harder but was also crying now.

"Oh sugar" I felt small cold, stone arms wrap around me and I started to full out sob, "Are you alright?"

I nodded, still sobbing on her.

"Shit honey, I was only teasing."

I nodded again and pulled away from Char giving a watery laugh, "I know, its just the same thing James said when all this started and then she hit you just like Rose would Em and I miss my brother bear so much and he'd of said something like that to." I was gulping in air as I spoke and felt a strong wave of calm.

"It's alright Bella, why don't you let Char take you inside and you can have a hot bath."

"That's a great idea Major, come on sugar, you come with me and we will get you all set."

I followed Char into the house and up to a beautiful room and through to the attached bathroom. Char immediately started the water pouring salts and bubbles into it.

"You get out of those clothes and into the tub and I will get you something clean to wear."

As soon as the bathroom door closed, I did as she said. The water was hot and lavender scented. I immediately felt relaxed.

A moment later, there was a knock on the door and Char came back in, she sat on the edge of the tub and began washing my hair. I moaned at the sensation. There was nothing as relaxing as someone washing your hair, except maybe if they did it while you soaked in a lavender scented bubble bath.

When she finished, she pulled a showerhead from next to the tap and turned it on to rinse. Then she conditioned it. I was in heaven.

She left me alone to soak after, turning on the jets as she went. I let myself soak for a good half hour before I washed and got out.

On the bed was a new tank top and a pair of Capri yoga pants with clean underwear and a sports bra. I pulled it all on and went downstairs.

"Feeling better? Jasper says you didn't bring anything so I got you some of my stuff, I hope it fits ok? We'll get you some new things right away."

"It fits fine, thank you. And yes, I feel much better."

"Good," she smiled at me, "Peter said we'd have a human visitor so I went down before the shop closed last night and got groceries. I wasn't sure what you liked though so I just got a couple things. Jazz wants to head out soon anyways."

"Head out where?"

Jasper spoke up then coming into the room, "New York State. Peter and Char have a place there. It should be safe and the Cullen's don't know about it so Edward wont come to find you there."

I nodded, "Ok Jasper."

"We are going to stop in New York for a couple days to and we will get everything you need."

I blushed, "Um, I ah, don't have my wallet even, Alice wouldn't let me bring my handbag."

"She'll have used it to cover up your death Darlin' we can't have those cards being used anymore."

"Right" I nodded. I had nothing, no money, no identification, no clothes, nothing.

"Don't worry on it, we'll get you new id's and cards honey." Peter told her. "I'll make that call now."

"Um, Peter?"

"Yeah honey?"

"What name will I be given?"

Jasper was the one to speak up, "You can keep Isabella but you should choose a different surname name, can't be your mothers either at least not for a few decades. We can use Cullen if you like or you can use our name, my brother Char and I are Whitlock's, whatever you want really." I saw Peter and Char give him an odd look but I ignored them.

"I thought your name was Hale?"

"No, that's Rose's surname I used it a while with the Cullen's when we played siblings but the name is Whitlock."

"Um, well am passing as your sibling? I mean we don't really look anything alike."

Jasper had an odd look on his face and Peter laughed.

"Sugar, he just meant that you're welcome to our family for however long you are with us and are more than welcome to use our name though you don't need to by any means." Charlotte said putting a hand on the small of my back.

"I imagine you'll want to use Cullen and I believe Carlisle has already looked into getting those identifications for you in preparation of the future." Jasper added.

"Um, no, if it's not to much bother I'd rather not."

Jasper shot me a surprised look, "You'd want to be a Whitlock?"

I blushed, refusing to think about that or the warm feeling the suggestion gave me in the pit of my stomach, "If it's ok maybe I could use McCarty? If you don't think Emmett would mind."

"Not at all Darlin, he'd be very pleased, he's felt such a strong familial love for you from the first time you came over."

I blushed again, I loved my brother bear too, he was the older brother I had never thought to want.

"He'll be mighty touched Darlin, so it will be Isabella McCarty, any middle name?"

"Um, my middle name is Marie."

"Alright, Isabella Marie McCarty, I will have Jenks draw up your new identification, birth certificate and bank account, it should all be here in a couple days and then we will head out to New York." Peter said before disappearing.

"Um Jasper," I blushed again, "What about money?"

"Don't worry about that, it's nothing to us and we need to focus on keeping you safe." Char told me reassuringly, "Now lets get you fed."

I wanted to argue with her but what could I say, even if I had my bank cards Bella Swan was dead, her cards couldn't be used. I would just have to find a way to pay them all back when this was over.

We stayed in New Orleans for three days before driving to New York. Peter was a laugh and Charlotte was so sweet, I loved them both. I worried about the family but Jasper assured me they were fine. I knew they were asking to talk to me, I had even heard Edward shouting through his phone one day but Jasper would just hang up on him. He refused to put me on the phone with any of them. I felt bad for causing trouble for him with them, he always looked so stressed when they called but I had faith in Alice.

I spent most of my time with Char or reading and chatting with Jasper in his den. It was a good few days. The drive to New York was actually fun, Peter thought of games to play while we drove and Char and I would go through magazines looking at clothes to buy in New York. Normally this would not be very enjoyable. Alice always went a little over board and our tastes were different, surprisingly though Char and I liked similar things.

We checked into a nice hotel, I had a nap, and something to eat, then the boys followed us around as we shopped. Surprisingly it was a lot of fun. I needed everything so we had a lot to buy, because of this Char decided it was time for a new wardrobe as well, and only packed two changes of clothes for us both.

We found several pairs of jeans, tank tops, t-shirts, hoodies, and I even let her talk me into a couple of really cute skirts and dresses. Every store we went into the boys waited patently outside until we came out and then they took our bags as we moved on to the next store.

Oh no, Victoria Secret.

I followed Char inside and went straight to the plain cotton bras and panties.

"Oh sugar those do nothing for you and they are so plain, come on." She dragged me over to a display of lace.

"Char its not like anyone will see my under things."

"One day they might and besides its for you sugar, it always makes you feel sexier and more confident when you have sexy panties on, cause you know you look hot under whatever you are wearing and because if you talk to a man you know something he doesn't but wished he does. Trust me."

I blushed but took the panties she handed me, I was grateful when I saw they were all lace boy shorts and not the string thongs I saw at another table. Next, we moved onto bras and she was right, the ones she picked out fit better and my clothes looked nicer over them.

We also bought some cotton boy shorts, tank tops and sleep pants. While we paid I looked to Char, "I think we have mostly everything maybe we should shop for the guys now, Jasper needs all new stuff to."

"Right, good thinking, lets hit up Saks." She nodded.

"You guys put this lot in the truck and we'll meet you at Saks." She said handing our latest bags to the already full hands of Peter and Jasper.

"Stay vigilant, don't let her outta your sight." Jasper growled at her.

"I will Major" she nodded.

"Why do you call him that Char?" I asked as we walked, "I mean I know he was the youngest major in the civil war and all but that was when he was human."

"He's the youngest to rank major in military history sugar but that's not why we call him the Major."

"So why?"

"Shug, Jazz did a lot more than just fight in the civil war but that's a story for him to tell."

I was curious but I could respect that she didn't feel comfortable telling his stories.

We went straight to the men's department and began looking at clothes for the guys. It wasn't long before they joined us.

"What are you looking for over here?" Peter asked, looking around us.

"Jasper needs clothes to so Charlotte didn't pack you any either." I told him.

"Here baby, try these on." She told him, handing him a small pile.

Jasper looked around him with a small frown, "Everything alright Jasper?" I asked him concerned. Was there trouble, had James found us?

"Alice has done my shopping since we met." He told me.

"Well what do you like?"

He shrugged, "Don't know much about fashion Darlin. Before I was with Alice I stuck to Wranglers and cowboy boots but she didn't much approve"

I rolled my eyes and looked at his outfit, a white button down shirt with a pair of loose fitting jeans he'd gotten from Peter. Hmm, he looked hot in jeans. No, do not want to go there. Usually at home he wore slacks, picture him all preppied up, there that slightly curbs the lust.

"Well, have a look around and see what you like." I told him. Hoping he hadn't felt anything in my emotions, "Get what you'll be comfortable in."

He looked around a little lost so I picked up a few pairs of jeans and sent him to the change room, "Come out when you have something on, so we can see the fit."

He came out a minute later and yup; the man could seriously wear a pair of jeans. "How do they feel?"

"Great," he smiled at me and my heart skipped a beat.

I tried to hide my blush as he raised an eyebrow at me, shit empath, "Um here, try these and I'll get you more jeans or do you prefer slacks?" I had after all only ever seen him in them before.

"No, I like these jeans." He said looking down at the shirts that I had handed him. I nodded and left him there.

When I came back with several more pairs of jeans he was still standing there, "Did the shirts not fit? Or do you not like them?"

"They don't have sleeves." He said quietly.

"Sorry?" I asked him confused.

Charlotte came over, "come on Bella, I'll help you while the Major finishes trying on those jeans." She pulled me out of the change area and I saw Peter going over to Jasper.

I followed Charlotte as she began looking at some long sleeved shirts, "Sugar, Jasper don't wear t-shirts?" she told me in a low voice.

"Why?"

"He just don't" She said, venom pooling in her eyes as she looked through the rack of shirts.

I turned around and went back to the change room, "Jasper?" I guess he felt my distress because he stepped out of the change room instantly.

"What's wrong Bella? What happened?" he asked scouting the area behind me. I just stood there and stared at him. He was barefoot and had on a pair of dark wash jeans that were not done up and no shirt. I stared at his naked torso. Scars marred his pale skin, but as I stared at him all I could focus on was his pale skin stretched over the steel of his flat stomach. His arms were well defined and muscular, not bulky at all but strong and toned. They and his broad shoulders were also littered with scars. He was a fucking warrior, a dangerous predator and he was fucking hot.

"Um, uh, Bella?" Jasper shifted on his feet and I finally broke out of my lustful stupor. I forced myself to look away from his body and up to his face, he looked a little uncomfortable and quirked his eyebrow at me.

"I, ah, just came to see how you were doing with sizes."

"Fine."

I couldn't help my eyes wandering back over his body. "Ok, um, I'll just help Charlotte find you more shirts." My mouth felt dry, I wanted to lick and kiss every one of the scars and along every groove between his muscles. I backed away blushing, forcing my eyes off him, I turned and practically ran out of the dressing area. I sent Char in with all the clothes we found them. Once they had deemed they had all they needed we paid for it all and headed into the girls department for a quick look. I was still recovering from the embarrassment, not only had I been caught ogling him but he could also feel all the lust pouring off me, fucking empath.

Next we went for shoes, Char insisted on me trying some heals despite my balance problems, I was surprised a couple pairs were actually comfortable so I let her talk me into them but also bought two pairs of ballet flats, all-stars and a really cute pair of caramel color cowboy boots.

Finally, Charlotte declared we were done. I was relieved. I didn't mind shopping with Char, it was even kind of fun but after so many hours, I was tired and hungry. We went back to the hotel and Jasper ordered me room service. I fell asleep right after I ate. The next morning we went shopping again, urg, though this time we went and got some luggage, and Char and I got new handbags and wallets. Then we went and bought some kitchen items.

After I ate lunch we went back to the hotel and quickly packed everything up, Jasper came in just as we finished.

"Bella, Alice called."

"Is everything alright?"

"Yes, she and the family are fine. She says to stay on the path we are on and that things are going the way they are meant to. She also said we would be staying one more night and to turn the TV on channel six at five."

"Ok, well, what shall we do then?"

"I think we should lay low to be safe. Alice says we are ok here but I don't want to go out and invite trouble."

"Alright." I nodded.

"We can maybe go to the bookstore across the street if you want to get a few books."

I smiled brightly at him, "That would be great."

We spent a couple hours going through all the books, I selected six and Jasper also bought a civil war book he hadn't read and a book on strategy in modern warfare."

We went back to the hotel just in time to pack away the books in our luggage and got settled before turning on the TV. It was the news. After a few stories, we heard my name.

I watched the report of my untimely death, and lay in Jasper's lap crying. It was over; Bella Swan was well and truly gone. I would never see my loving, erratic mother again or my quiet, caring father. I cried and Jasper stroked my hair. He didn't try to take the pain away, he knew I needed to grieve so he just sat with me and let me cry. After a while, I heard him singing softly. I lay there listening to his soothing voice his hand running over my head and drifted into sleep.

When I woke, Jasper was sitting in a chair beside the bed reading.

"Did you sit there all night?"

"You were having nightmares, I wanted to help you sleep."

"Thank you Jasper."

"It's not a problem Bella."

"Thank you for sitting with me last night, I know it was silly, I mean it's not like anyone really died."

"It's not silly at all Bella. And someone did die, Bella Swan did, only you live with all her memories, all the love for the people she had in her life, but you can never see them, you mourn their loss and that is not silly at all."

"Thank you." I told him, biting back fresh tears. I felt a wave of calm and sent him a grateful smile.

"Why don't you go shower and have your human moments while I order you some breakfast? Then we'll get Peter and Charlotte and go."

I nodded and got off the bed to go to the bathroom, only then noticing I was in my pajama's, the last memory I had was falling asleep after the news, fully dressed, "Um, Jasper, did you change me?" I asked blushing crimson.

"Charlotte came in and changed you while I waited in the other room. You woke up partly but I sang you back to sleep, do you not recall this?"

"No, I must have still been mostly sleeping."

"Yes, well, it was a long day."

I nodded and went into the bathroom. After my morning ritual, I went out and found French toast with strawberries waiting for me, yum.

Peter and Jasper loaded the truck while Char sat with me as I ate. As soon as I finished, we got back on the road.

We drove out of the city and as it disappeared behind us, it was like we entered another world. Trees replaced all the concrete; we kept driving as civilization got further and further away, up into the mountains. The road gave way to gravel and then to dirt that I wasn't so sure was even a road. This was a couple miles long and ended at a large three-story log cabin built against the mountain.

"The second story is actually the main floor in the back. The bottom floor is just the garages, utility and laundry rooms and storage." Charlotte told me as we got out of the truck. There was a large balcony on the second story. It was so beautiful.

"It's beautiful." I told her as I looked around at the house and the woods surrounding.

"Come on and I will show you inside." Char pulled me inside the side door and up the stairs. Inside was a huge open space. The wall on the back was almost all glass and opened onto the patio I had seen below. In the space was a massive living room and a moderate sized kitchen. There was a huge entertainment center, two extra long oversized couches that looked like the most comfortable couches invented and two leather chairs sat on either end of the massive stone gas fireplace, which faced the entertainment system. The side was the wall that was all the windows and the other area was the kitchen. The kitchen was not as long as the living room, nor nearly as large. It was a decent size though especially considering they didn't have need of one. On that wall next to the kitchen was a set of stairs. The ceiling over the kitchen was a little lower than the living area as well and when you looked up from the living room, you could see the railing of the second floor.

I followed Charlotte up the steps but stopped at the rail to look out the wall of windows across the living room. The view was spectacular.

There was nothing on the little balcony over the kitchen; it was just like a very wide hallway with an archway leading to another hall.

"The first door here on the left is mine and Peter's room, then is a guest room on the right, next to ours is another guest room and across from that is Jasper's study. You can pick which of the guest rooms you want. Both have large en-suite bathrooms with jetted tubs and showers with dual head rain showerheads and side showerheads. I love showers and baths." Charlotte grinned at me.

"Either of them would be great Char. I can't thank you enough for taking me in."

"We're family sugar, of course you are welcome here. Come on, you should see them both before deciding." She pulled me into the first room.

Unlike the main floor where the walls of the cabin were the same natural wood as the exterior, up here the rooms were more like a house with painted walls. This room had walls that were a deep rich navy blue. It had a large platform bed in dark wood and matching dresser. Char dragged me into the bathroom next to see modern bathroom. The walls were a soft blue white, the whole bathroom looked bright and white and clean, the bath tub was set against the wall and you stepped up two steps to climb in, a ledge around it held many candles and some sea shells. There was a large window behind it looking out at the trees.

"Its beautiful Char."

"Well don't decide yet, you have to see the next one first." She said excitedly grabbing my hand again.

I followed her down the hall to the last room on the left. The walls were a deep charcoal, there was a modern style dark wood dresser and huge four poster bed with white sheets, white gauzy drapes hung in the corners of the bed and the far door opened onto a balcony, there was a window with a charcoal chair set by it and a low round table next to it. Beside the window was the door leading out to the balcony. I followed Char into the bathroom, like the previous one, it was huge, with a walk in shower big enough for more than one a large tub and beautiful vanity. This one had the same charcoal walls as the bedroom. The tub was a large oval and on the wall above it was a long frame of tea light candles. The tiles, tub, shower, sink and toilet were all bright white offsetting the dark of the walls and vanity.

"Char you are amazing." I breathed as we wandered back into the bedroom.

"This one has the balcony but you'll share it with Jazz." She told me leading me out to see the long balcony that over looked the yard.

"Do you know which one you prefer?"

"They are both so lovely, but if it would be alright I think I like this one the best."

"Of course. Now come let me show you my room." She said grabbing my hand again and leading me back down the hall, "Peter can you put her things in the back room next to ours." She said in a normal voice, knowing he would hear her below.

"Thank you." I said in the same voice.

"We've never really had anyone here before, Jasper of course and our friend Garrett has stopped by but no one who would appreciate my work." She said pulling me into her room.

This one was done much more modern than the others, it had three black walls and one red. Against the red wall was a large circular black bed with red sheets and a black duvet. On the wall opposite the red wall the black wall had red wild flowers painted on and a large black dresser. She then led me through to the bathroom. It was even larger than the other two. Your bathroom is on the other side of this wall, with all the extra insulation and without the vampire hearing you shouldn't hear us. If you do, well, sorry." Charlotte laughed.

Her bathroom had all deep red walls and the toilet, large claw foot tub, sink, vanity and shower were all black, the towels were black and red. Even the lights hanging down over the tub had red light fixtures.

"It's great Char."

"We have a balcony off the side as well, and it has a tub, I love having a bath outside, come on, I'll show you."

I followed her back into the room and she removed the black curtains along one wall. I followed her out onto the patio where there was a large white oval tub.

"You can borrow it too." Charlotte told me graciously, "It's wonderfully relaxing to sit here in a bubble bath and look out at the forest."

"Thank you Charlotte. You are too kind to me." I hugged her.

"Come on, the boys probably have our stuff upstairs, I'll help you put away yours if you help me do mine."

I laughed, "That sounds great." We spent the rest of the day putting away our clothes and dancing around to music until my stomach rumbled.

"Oh, I forgot, you need to eat." I swear Char would be blushing if she were human.

"Don't worry Char, I forgot about eating to, let's go find something."

"No, I mean we all forgot you eat. Bella, we don't have food here." She looked truly distressed.

Until we heard a booming laugh from downstairs, "Don't worry, Jazz and I went while you were busy, there is plenty of food."

"Thank you Peter." I said in a normal voice. Char looked so relieved it was almost funny and I linked my arm with hers, "Come on Char baby let's feed the human." She laughed and we went downstairs.

"I wasn't sure what you liked but I remembered some of the things Esme got for you and then bought a few more things that looked popular." Jasper said as we came down the stairs. They were playing a video game.

"Thanks Jazz."

Charlotte watched as I cooked myself something to eat, "Could you teach me to help?" she asked as I sat down to eat.

"Sure Char but I don't want you to feel like you need to, I can do it myself."

"I know, but I'd like to, it would be fun."

"Sure then, next meal you can help."

When I finished she helped me clean up, well really she cleaned up in the time it took me to put away the ingredients I used.

"Shall we watch a movie?" Jasper asked.

I nodded and went to curl up on the couch, while he got up to put one in. Charlotte curled up with Peter on the other couch and Jasper sat back in the chair he was in earlier. I fell asleep during the movie and woke up as I was being laid on my bed.

"Thank you Jazz."

"Your welcome Bella." He said leaving my room and closing the door gently. I pulled off my jeans and bra not bothering to change and slid between the cool sheets.

In the morning I tested out my new shower first thing, it was heaven.

I wandered down and Char watched me make toast, thank god we bought a toaster, and coffee, what would I have done without it.

After breakfast I went out with Char as she showed me the immediate area, she even put me on her back and ran us to a little clearing with a small lake. It was beautiful. Odd to be on her back though as she was about my same size, I imagine it would look funny if someone were to see it. At least she wasn't Alice's size, now that would look odd.

When we got back she helped me make soup and a sandwich to warm up, it might be spring but it was still pretty cold in the mountains and holding onto a freezing vampire as she ran made it colder.

After my lunch I wandered back upstairs to my room, I saw the door to Jaspers study open and hesitated, I wanted to ask him about Alice and the family but wasn't sure if I should disturb him.

"Come in Bella." I entered slowly, "What has you conflicted?"

"I didn't want to bother you." I told him shyly.

"You aren't" he replied motioning me to sit. I looked around the room; the walls were covered in bookshelves that matched the wood of the floor. The walls that did show were a dark olive green. The room held a large coffee table and comfortable looking chocolate leather couch with two dark olive green chairs that matched the paint on the walls not lined with shelves.

I went and sat down, curling my bare toes beneath me.

"You're alright? Do you like it here?"

"It's beautiful Jazz."

"You and Char have become friends."

It wasn't really a question but I answered anyways, "Yeah, she's great, a good friend. She went hunting with Peter."

"Yes, they will be back in a few hours."

"Have you talked to the Cullen's?"

"Yes, they continue to call. Edward is very angry."

"I'm sorry Jasper." I bit back tears.

"This is not your fault Bella. It is James' and it is Edwards."

"Edwards?"

"He should not have brought you into this world." His words stung and I know he felt the jolt of pain as he pushed out a small dose of calm, "I do not mean it against you Bella but it was foolish of him to bring you into our world without changing you."

"It was just to early to change me."

"No Bella, Edward does not want you turned."

I knew this was because he did not love me, I know Alice said he did, but if he really loved me, if I was his mate he would want to change me, but even Alice said I wasn't his. I felt Jasper pushing calm at me again, "I could be wrong Bella." He said soothingly.

"No, you aren't" my voice wobbled out.

"Alice has seen you a vampire."

I smiled a watery smile at him, "Yeah, she has. Edward won't change me though." I admitted before biting my tongue.

He smiled back at me, "If it's me he'll tear me to pieces, that fucker already wants my dick on a pyre for takin yeh."

I laughed because I was pretty sure it would be him, unless it was Peter or Char or maybe Alice, would I still be human when I saw them all again? Alice hadn't said, only that I would see them again.

"Will you talk to him Bella? Try to explain."

I shook my head biting back the tears but they came out anyways, "I can't, I'm sorry."

He nodded, "because of Alice?"

I nodded, "and because of me."

He sighed, "Ok, no Edward, how about Emmett? He's halfway ready to roast my ass too."

I shook my head again fresh tears assaulting me. "I take it that will be a no to Carlisle as well." I just nodded "and Esme? She is very concerned." I shook my head and cried harder.

I felt the waves of calm from Jasper as he pulled me up and into his lap, "It's ok Bella, you don't have to talk to them."

"I miss them so much Jazz."

"I know Darlin" He rubbed my back and began singing in a low voice; I could feel the movement in his chest and relaxed into him.

"Jasper?" I asked after a few minutes, my voice no more than a whisper.

"Yeah Darlin?" he asked, his voice low as well.

"Do you miss them?"

"Yeah, I suppose I do but I've been away from them before, I will see them again, I just hope they will forgive me for this."

"For what?"

"Stealing their daughter or sister or mate away."

"They will."

"Alice tell you that?"

"No, but I know they will. You are only protecting me, like Alice asked."

"Yeah Darlin, I just don't know as they'll agree with it bein me and not Edward or hell, any of 'em asides me."

"Why?"

"Black sheep of the family remember Darlin, the one who still samples the natural food source."

I laughed lightly, "only the dying or the one's that need killing though. I'm not either. Well maybe the former with James' after me."

His arms tightened their hold a little, "You wont be dyin Darlin, I wont let James get ya. I can protect you. So can Peter and Charlotte, better 'n any other."

"Must be why Alice sent us away and to them then."

"Must be." He agreed.

"Do you miss her?"

He sighed, "yes. I miss her. I miss what we were."

"What do you mean?"

"You know Alice would do anything to keep you safe Darlin, she really does love you like a sister."

I nodded into his chest, "I know Jazz. She only left me because she thought she needed to, part of the vision."

"She didn't leave you, Darlin, she left me."

I sat up and looked into his eyes, "Jazz?"

"It's been comin a while Darlin, things 've been different with us for a few years, they got worse when we got here and then better for a bit and back to worse. She called it quits."

"I'm sorry Jazz."

"So am I Darlin, I loved her a lot a years but she ain't my mate 'n I ain't hers so if she's comin to the time when she finds hers its best to end it. Even if she ain't I suppose she's right and it was more than time. We were comfortable with each other but we both had to change to be together, I tried to change more for her since I felt indebted to her but I wasn't what she needed and while she was what I needed for a time she ain't been for a long time. I still love her, always will."

I leaned into him and began to sing softly, I felt him relax back in the chair, pulling me with him, "You got a lovely voice Darlin" he whispered as I sang of heartache. Jasper might not know it but we were both suffering that now, only I knew that while the man I loved would find his mate I also knew I was sitting in the lap of my mate and all he knew was he lost the woman he loved. I ached for him.

After a few songs, I fell silent and Jasper began to sing.

I woke in my room to a night sky.

The next weeks went by in an easy routine. Charlotte had mastered the coffee maker and simple breakfasts, toast and scrambled eggs and pancakes, she even learned French toast and I would wake up to a lovely meal. I usually had something small and easy around lunchtime and we would cook dinner together. We even took to watching the food network for new recipes.

I usually spent the mornings with Char, we'd go for walks, work in the garden, or redesign the rooms in her house in Montana, mostly we'd talk and laugh and dance around. We would all spend the afternoons together, we rode four wheelers and dirt bikes up the mountains and played video games. As the temperature rose we went hiking and swam in the little lake Char had shown me. We watched movies and played board games and they taught me poker, I was getting ok and could hold my own with Char, Jasper's talent always brought him out on top. He also taught me chess, though I knew he was playing very easy with me. I watched the others mock fight sometimes and Peter and I would tease each other. In the evenings, we'd watch movies or I'd curl up with Jasper in his study and read.

Often he would sing me to sleep and the nights he didn't I missed him. Sometimes I knew I had nightmares though I never remembered them, I suppose it was because I never really had them, I'd just wake up and find Jazz reading in the chair by the window having come in to soothe my sleep. It was embarrassing the first time I had gotten up and gone to the bathroom with him there, forgetting I was only in my tank and cotton boy shorts but after the third time I just shrugged it off and didn't pay attention to it. He saw me in a bikini all the time.

It was a peaceful and easy existence. Edward stopped calling to yell at Jasper, saying he would just track us. Jazz just laughed and told him he was a terrible tracker. Slowly the others had stopped calling so much as well. Esme would still leave messages for me saying she loved and missed me. They all always said they wanted me to come home.

Alice called to tell me all was on track and to stay strong with the others. It wasn't time to talk to any of them yet. I wished I'd been able to ask her about things but with three vampires able to listen in, I knew I couldn't. I suppose she planned it that way, cryptic pixie.

I mourned my relationship with Edward but found it easier than I would have thought to be away from the family I loved so well. Peter was like Emmett in many ways and I felt very close to my new brother. Char was my best friend and sister, I loved Alice, but I had a deep connection to Char to. And Jazz, I wished Alice had never told me I was his mate. I spend so much time with him now and as each day passed, I feel closer to him than before. Often he used his power to express things instead of saying them, I learned to send him emotions and listen to those he sent me. It drove Peter nuts when we almost conversed like this.

I was also ridiculously attracted to him. I mean all vampires are gorgeous but Jazz in well-fitting jeans and boots was drool worthy, I couldn't imagine why Alice had him in slacks and button downs he was sex walking in those damn jeans. Luckily he never commented on the lust he picked up, just quirked his eye brow at me, I would blush and turn away, trying to tamp it down and pretend it didn't happen.

To my surprise and delight, he had bought the t-shirts I had handed to him in New York. Charlotte looked at him surprised the first time he came outside in one and I could see her eyes well with venom.

I looked back over at Jazz and wanted to jump him. He looked over with the amused look and quirked eyebrow and I shot my eyes away from him. Even Peter had faltered in his step but continued forward to talk to Jasper without commenting on the shirt.

Later in his study I asked him about it and he finally told me about his past, about Maria and how he was turned, about being the Major, the God of War and getting all those scars.

I crawled into his lap and held him as I cried for him. I told him he was beautiful and threw all my sincerity mixed with a little desire at him. He held on to me tightly as I told him over and over that he was not a monster, he was a goddamn warrior and survivor and I was proud of him and loved him. I had to let that one slip of course but hurried to tell him he was family and I would always love and be proud of him. I hoped he bought it, can an empath tell the difference between lustful love and sibling love? I kind of hoped not.

After that he wore the t-shirts almost every day and when we went swimming he wore only shorts like Peter. I had seen the scars on him and Char but not asked; now I knew where they came from.

I had hugged Char the morning after my chat with Jasper and told her how beautiful she was and she sobbed in my arms.

When she went off Peter pulled me into his arms and thanked me for being so good and loving his wife. I hugged him and told him I loved them both the same and he was just as beautiful. He laughed and teased me about wanting him but I saw in his eyes my words had affected him to.

I truly loved this new family of mine and while I missed my parents and the Cullen's I was happy here. I loved our happy little life in the woods on the mountain.

Of course things had to change, they always do.

It had been three days since I'd seen Jasper and I was beginning to really worry. I didn't sleep well at night and that third night was the worst, on the fourth day I sat on the porch waiting for him, cursing him for leaving his cell behind, he couldn't have just left me, he wouldn't, would he? I bit back tears.

"Jasper is fine Bella. I promise." Char reassured me.

I just nodded and kept my eyes on the trees. A few hours later, she came back out, "Sugar I need to hunt are you going to be okay here?"

I just nodded again. Where was he? He had to come back didn't he I mean he wouldn't just abandon me here, was he not happy? Did he miss Alice and the Cullen's more than he let on?

"Bella? What's wrong?" I was hit by strong wave of concern as Jasper appeared on the porch.

I jumped up and ran into his arms sobbing. He sank to his knees on the porch pushing calm into me, "Tell me what happened Darlin, talk to me, I'll make it better." He murmured.

I felt the sadness turn to anger and pushed away from him, he was instantly standing again as well and I pushed him again hitting my fists against his chest, "You bastard, why would you do that, just disappear for days, you didn't even bring your phone, what if something happened, what if James got you?" I demanded.

He captured my wrists in his hand and pulled me to him, "Bella, I'm fine, you think that fucker could hurt me? I'm the fucking God of War remember?"

I nodded sobbing into his chest and clinging to him now.

"I'm sorry Darlin, I didn't mean for you to worry, I should have had my phone." I felt his calm seeping into me and took a few deep breaths but still held on to him.

"Where were you?"

"I was in the woods."

"Why?"

"Hunting."

"You went hunting for four days without telling me? Jazz you tell me when you're going for four hours why wouldn't you think I would worry?"

"I'm sorry Darlin, I wasn't gone that long I was just in the woods. I didn't want to come back yet."

"Why? Am I bothering you? Are you not happy? Do you need space? I'm sorry, it's selfish of me to keep you so tied here." I said pushing away from him.

"No, it isn't selfish Bella, I want to be here, I am very happy here, more than I can remember being in a very long time."

"But I am around to much and to needy, stupid human and all."

"Bella, it had nothing to do with you, well that's not true but not because I didn't want to be here, I do, I just didn't want to upset you?"

"I don't understand, why would I be upset? You want to be here but do you not want me here?" all my stupid insecurities' were drowning me and I heard him growl.

"I told you before damnit Bella, do not think those kinds of thoughts, you damn well are worth it and of course I want you here. Fuck. Bella, turn around and look at me please." He said turning me by my arm and lifting my chin to meet his eyes.

They were a strange orangey copper color. I gasped and raised my hand to touch near them, "Your eyes."

"Peter and I ran into a couple of hikers in the woods, they had a little girl hostage, fucking perverts. She was fighting them and they knocked her out. We attacked and fed. I took the girl to a ranger station on the other side of the mountain and left her there, waited in the tree line until she was found. I wanted my eyes to lighten before you saw me again."

"Why?" I was entranced with the color of his eyes, I felt like I was drowning in them, they were fire and he was ice. "I knew you hunted people Jazz, one's who needed killing, and they obviously needed killing."

"Knowin and knowin are two different things Bella. Theory and proof."

"I'd have been disappointed in you if you let them live, let them hurt that girl or another one like her."

He searched my emotions, "You really mean that, not a speck of disgust or disappointment, not even a little fear. I killed someone Bella and you aren't the least afraid."

"No" I whispered, tracing my finger under his eye again.

"Bella" His voice came out a low growl.

"Jazz." I breathed.

"Everythin alright?" Peter called as he and Char came out of the woods.

We stepped away from each other and I blushed trying to push down the lust coursing through me, knowing he could feel it.

Jasper's phone started ringing from the patio where I had dropped it when he had finally showed up, thankful for the distraction I picked it up not looking at the caller id, not thinking, "Hello?"

"Bella? Is that you?" I snapped the phone down and looked at the screen seeing Edwards name. "Bella, love, are you alright? Talk to me." I looked at Jazz and held the phone out to him; he just stood there staring at me. "BELLA! Are you alright? Are you there? Is Jasper around, love you have to tell me where you are, I'll come get you; you know he is dangerous. I'll keep you safe love, we'll go away together and…"

I didn't let him finish, as soon as the word dangerous came out of his mouth I snapped forgetting my promise to Alice I put the phone to my ear, "You arrogant asshole! Jasper is not dangerous, not to me anyways but I am pretty sure if you come within twenty miles of us he'll tear your ass to pieces you judgmental prick! He's here keeping me safe and taking shit from the family for it well fuck all of you! And if he wants to hunt criminals I'll fucking play bait! I'd be safe enough with him watching out for me even if there were three James' hunting me! Do not call us again Edward, as far as I am concerned you and I are over, have been over from the moment I left that damn hotel in Phoenix and Bella Swan died. And that goes for the rest of the family to until they can be civil to him!"

"Bella, love you don't know what you are saying, it's him, he's manipulating you, keeping you from the family, we are all so worried and he wont let any of us talk to you."

"Fuck you! Jasper is not manipulating me, I am not a child, he respects me, and my choices and I chose not to talk to you! Now don't you say one more thing about him or I will Zippo your ass next time I see you!" I snarled snapping the phone shut and screeching, "That arrogant, judgmental, know-it all ass!"

I heard laughter behind me and saw Peter busting a gut, Charlotte looked like she was trying hard but failing to hold back her own laughter, Jasper just stared at me in shock.

I blushed crimson, "sorry" I muttered.

"That was the funniest fucking thing I have ever seen, remind me not to piss you off!" Peter laughed, "Zippo his ass, fucking priceless!"

Charlotte lost the battle and began to laugh as well.

I peaked at Jasper again, "Thank you Bella." He said softly. I saw Charlotte pulling Peter inside the open doors.

"For yelling at your brother?"

"For sticking up for me." He said pulling me into a hug. "I'm sorry I caused you to fight with him though, I am sure you can call him later and he will forgive you, tell him it was stress."

"No, Jazz, I don't want him to forgive me. It's over."

He bent down until his cool lips were only a centimeter from my ear, his cool breath running along my skin making me shiver, "I should feel bad. I took you away from him, caused all this."

"You didn't. You're protecting me."

"Am I?" he asked, trailing his nose across my jaw, "I never planned to steal you away from him. To take what was his."

"You didn't."

"But I want to." He breathed next to my ear again. My knees felt weak as my body flooded with desire. "I should feel bad, but I don't."

"Jasper." The ringing phone startled us apart again and I stepped away to catch my breath, looking down at the screen, Alice.


	2. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer – I do not own Twilight. All recognizable plot and characters belong to the talented Stephanie Meyer.**

**Please review!**

I flicked it open, "Alice I'm sorry."

"Don't be, let me talk to Jazz a sec, I promise I'll talk with you after."

I handed him the phone and he listened to whatever she said before handing me back the phone, "Peter, Char, let's go." His voice was commanding and they were instantly at his side.

"Major?" Peter asked, "I don't sense trouble."

"No, Alice needs a minute with Bella, we are going to town to get her more groceries."

"Let me get my list." Char disappeared and was back in a second. Then I watched them all get into the truck and drive away.

"They are gone." I told Alice, "I'm sorry Alice. I know I wasn't supposed to talk to him."

"That was when he might have convinced you to go home, this was good Bella. I didn't see it because it was a snap decision but I was in the house when it happened, harsh Bella but in essence it needed to happen, you breaking up with him I mean, not threatening him with a Zippo."

"I was just so angry."

"You love him?"

"Not as much as I thought, so much has changed Alice."

"It was meant to but I meant Jazz, you love him."

"I, I don't know." I thought about it, I loved spending time with him, talking to him, listening to him sing, playing games with him, teasing him, his laugh, and he was so sexy it hurt. I always wanted to be near him and I went nuts the last few days without him.

"Stop thinking so much Bella, you know you love him."

"I think you're right."

"Of course I am. He loves you to, he's just not realized it's because you are his mate. He will, very soon actually. But um, well,"

"What is it Alice?"

"You'll need Charlotte's help. He's being stubborn about this, fucker wont see what's right in front of him but the Major will and it could possibly be a little dangerous but I'm not sure, I can't really see everything until the decisions are made."

"Alice he is the Major and what do you mean dangerous?"

"I know he is the Major Bella but he's locked a part of him away, the dark and very, very deadly part, the God of War part. He comes out to play sometimes and it is usually a terrifying and very bad thing Bella."

"So what do we need to do? You want me to actually play bait for James or something?"

"No, god no."

"So what?"

"I don't know that's why you need Charlotte."

"What about James?"

"Don't worry about him, just focus on Jasper. Now that Edward is out of the picture, he should accept the lust between you but if he kissed you just then he would beat himself up for taking advantage of you, disappear for over a week, and then distance himself when he got back. I don't know Bella. I'm sorry I can't see much. I know you are on course though, please just keep trusting me, he'll be yours soon, it will be over whelming at first but it'll all work out, I promise. Just trust me. Ok?"

"Ok, Alice, I trust you. What about James though?"

"I told you, don't worry about James. I have to go now. Esme will call you as soon as we hang up, you can take the call but remember don't tell her about your being mates, that you are with Char and Peter or where you are just tell her you are safe and happy and want to stay with Jasper. Ok?"

"Ok, Alice, I promise."

"I love you Bella."

"I love you to Alice."

"You do? I know you have Charlotte now and you like her better but you still love me to?"

"Of course I love you Alice, and I don't like her better I like her just the same, you are both my sisters."

"I miss you Bella."

"I miss you to Alice, can you call me again?"

"In a little while I will. Take care of Jazz Bella. I love you." She said hanging up the phone.

As soon as I snapped it shut it rang again. I didn't check the caller id as I answered, already knowing who it was.

"Hello Esme."

"Oh Bella, baby, how are you? It is so good to hear your voice, I've been trying to get Jasper to let me talk to you all summer."

I bit back tears, "I'm sorry Esme."

"I heard what happened between you and Edward. Are you alright baby? Where are you? Is Jasper hunting humans again? Are you safe? Please tell me you are not playing bait or anything so ridiculous."

"I'm fine Esme, Jasper killed a pedophile in the woods, I don't care if he wants to eat criminals Esme but I am not playing bait, god he would have a fit if I were anywhere near those kinds of people."

"Baby, where are you? Tell Jasper to bring you home, or let us come to you. We'll take care of you."

"No Esme. I'm safe here."

"You'll be safe with us to Bella. We wont let anyone hurt you." I heard Carlisle's voice in the back and knew I had to get off.

"I know, but I am happy here, please don't worry, Jasper is taking care of me, he's keeping me safe. I miss you."

"We miss you to Bella. Please think about it and come home."

"I love you." I told her and shut the phone.

I went up to my room and ran a bubble bath; then I laid back in the warm water and cried.

A little while later I heard them all coming home.

"Bella are you alright?" I heard Jasper's voice through the door and got out of the tub.

"Yes, can you ask Charlotte to come up please?"

"Thirty seconds later and she was standing in my room, "what is it sugar?"

"Can we go out to the lake? Just us?"

"Of course sugar, you get dressed and I will pack you something to eat."

"Thanks Char." I smiled at her and got dressed.

We walked at my pace into the trees a ways before she picked me up and put me on her back to run to the lake.

"You alright sugar?"

"Yeah, it's just been a long day, with Jazz finally coming back from the disappearing act and Edward and then Alice and Esme, I just needed a little peace."

"Jazz was just worried how you'd take it, he didn't want to frighten you."

"You and Peter both have blood red eyes, why would his copper ones scare me when yours don't?"

"Because his are normally golden, I'm not sure his exact reasoning sugar, the major just didn't want to upset you. He cares a lot about you."

"I know." I sighed.

"I'm sorry about you and Edward."

"No you aren't." I laughed. It was no secret she didn't like Edward, neither did Peter. They had both looked at me in shock when Jasper told them I was his and then bluntly asked me why. I had laughed and shrugged and said it was because I hadn't met them. They laughed as well and we had moved on to a new topic.

"Well I am if you are hurting over it. I might not like the pretentious little twit but if you love him."

"I don't" I think I even surprised myself on that one, "I thought I did and I mourned leaving him but it was over the day Alice had me leave with Jasper."

"Why sugar?"

"I'm not his mate. Apparently he's going to find her sometime in the next couple years though."

"Alice told you that?" I nodded, "The bitch." She spat.

"Charlotte"

"No Bella, I might not have been besties with her and she was never right for the Major but I liked her well enough, I cannot believe she would lay that on you on top of everything else."

"She had to."

"Why?"

"So that I wouldn't feel bad when I fell in love with my true mate."

"Wait, you are going to meet your true mate to?"

"Already did."

"What, who?"

"Jasper."

"Shit." She looked at me, "That fucker, I bet he knows to."

I looked at her confused, "Alice says Jasper hasn't realized it yet."

"Not Jasper sweetie, Peter, my husband just knows shit and he said something when you first came around that makes a whole lotta sense now. But that doesn't matter, why haven't you told him?"

"I can't, Alice said he needs to find out on his own and I can't tell anyone."

"But you are telling me, now."

"She said I could today, that I needed your help, that the Major would recognize me but we needed to make him."

"Ah shit, well I know one sure way that makes the Captain claim me over again every time but it might not end so well if the Major comes out to play and Jazz can't rein him in."

"How so?"

"Death, destruction and mayhem, a total blood bath."

I looked at her my throat dry as I tried to swallow. "Um, maybe a different way?"

"Well, you were about to kiss on the patio."

I blushed, "Nope, Alice said that makes him take off and start to avoid me. He has to actually recognize me as his mate."

"Sorry sugar but I think option a is our only option on that one. Unless you want to try to get James to attack but if we caused that he's definitely going rip me to pieces for putting you in danger, or you could really try to play bait but that would get me torn up to pieces again."

"OK, so what's plan a?"

"Seduction."

"Alice already said"

"Not of Jasper sugar."

"Sorry?"

"Hopefully it will just bring him to the surface and he won't actually come out to play."

"Char?"

"We need you to seduce another man in front of him sugar."

"You want me to try to make him jealous?"

"Exactly." She nodded. "To bad Jasper knows Peter feels brotherly to you, the Major might tear him apart but we could put him back together."

"You mentioned another friend who came here."

"Garrett? Hmm" she mused quietly for a minute, "Yes, I believe he might do it, though if the Major does tear him apart we will owe him big."

"The tearing him apart isn't a given though, he might not right?"

"Yes but its still better to risk it with a vampire than have some drunk horny humans hitting on you, that could really turn into a blood bath."

"Right. Ok, so let's ask Garrett."

"I'll call him now." She pulled out her phone and when it was answered, she began talking at a speed I could not follow. She paused a few times before speaking again and I wondered what they were saying to each other.

She closed the phone and smiled, "He's in."

I frowned, a little worried now, "Is he a human drinker?"

"He's like Peter and I, he wont hurt you. I'd have him pretend to attack you but we discussed it and it was a definite that the Major would tear him up and a possibility for pieces not being returned in punishment and god forbid you fell in fear and were hurt, Garrett would be burned before an explanation could be made."

"What do I do?"

"What do you mean?"

"When he get's here."

"Flirt."

"How?"

"Oh, well, um, wear your skirts and cute tanks, laugh when he says something funny, sit near him, touch him when you get the opportunity and just follow his lead, he'll do all the work anyways. Hopefully it wont take long for the Major to see another man after his mate."

"When will he get here?"

"Tomorrow."

"So soon."

She smiled at me, "Its time you got your mate sugar. Come on let's go back to the house. Act normal but stay a little closer to Jazz than normal."

I nodded at her and we went back to the house. "Thank you Char." I whispered in her ear as she ran.

Back at the house, the boys were playing video games. I went and sat down in a chair near Jasper.

"Feeling better Darlin?"

"Yeah, thanks Jazz." I shot him a smile and turned my attention back to the screen, "You kicking Petey's ass?"

"Hah," Peter scoffed, "Not a chance." Then he growled and Jasper won the round, "No fair fucker quit using that emotional shit to win."

Jasper just laughed, "Now why would I handy cap myself like that?"

"Alright, enough games, let's watch a movie, Bella is tired." Charlotte said coming to sit on the opposite couch.

"You alright Darlin" Jazz asked, I could feel him watching me, searching with his gift.

I thought of Esme and sadness came forth. He got up and pulled me into his arms, sitting us both back on the couch. He began to stroke my hair and hum softly, sending me calm, "I'm sorry today was so hard. You should never have had to fight with Edward like that over me."

"I'm not upset about Edward Jazz, I meant everything I said to him."

"Why are you sad then? Is it Alice?"

"I miss her but no, after she called I talked to Esme. I miss her so much Jazz, I miss them all."

"I can take you back Bella. I can keep you safe there."

"No," I sat up a little panicked.

"Shh," he said, sending me waves of calm, "We don't have to leave, I just don't want you to be sad."

"I'm happy here Jazz, I just miss them, but I don't want to leave. I'll be better tomorrow."

He sent me acceptance and contentedness as we lay there watching the movie Peter had put in. I got up to make dinner with Char when it ended.

"Shall we go read for a while when you finish?" Jasper asked coming to sit with us.

"Yes, I'm done, just let me clean up."

"I'll do it sugar, you just go on up with Jazz and rest. We'll see you in the morning."

"Thank you Char." I smiled at her and went up stairs with Jasper.

I went into my room and did my nighttime routine before going into Jasper's room where he waited on the couch. His arms reached out to me and he wrapped me in a blanket as we curled together on the couch and read. After a while, I began to get sleepy and he shifted me to a sitting position before he got up and lifted me into his arms carrying me to bed.

"Will you stay and sing to me tonight Jazz?"

He nodded and lay next to me and started singing. The next day I got up and went about my usual morning ritual, starting with my long hot shower and ending with my breakfast, with Charlotte sitting across from me talking about new recipes to try.

As we were cleaning the kitchen Peter came in, "Company is coming."

Jasper was immediately by my side, "You don't feel worried, who is it?"

"Garrett, he'll be here later today."

Jasper nodded, "He's a friend, same diet as Peter and Char, he wont hurt you Bella."

"I know Jazz, I trust you." I told him, laying my hand on his arm before walking past him and into the living room, "Shall we work on my Spanish this morning Char?"

"Excellent idea and we should do some more yoga after lunch." Char followed me outside and we walked to the stream not far from the house. We sat there for a couple hours as Char taught me Spanish. I wasn't very good but I was getting better.

We went back to the house and I made a snack before going to change into my black yoga pants and sports bra. I met Char out on the deck and we began stretching.

About half way through our routine, I felt eyes on me and knew the guys had come back. When we came up from standing forward end pose I looked over at them to see the new comer.

He had a sexy lazy grin and short brown blond hair, yum Sean Patrick Flannery a la Boondock Saints, hmm, even if Alice is wrong, it wont hurt a bit to flirt with this looker.

I heard a low growl and looked over at Jazz, I noticed the others were all looking at him to, "This is Bella. She is not to be touched." He warned in a low and dangerous voice.

"I get it, no nibbling on the local girl." He winked at me and I smiled.

"Come on Bella. Let's finish." Char encouraged.

We went back to our stretching while the boys went inside, I could still feel eyes on me.

When we finished Char and I walked down to the lake. It took over an hour since Char would walk it at my pace. We jumped right in the icy water and laughed splashing around.

"When we get back to the house we'll shower and make dinner, then will come the fun and games."

"Are you sure this is a good idea Char?"

"No, but its all I can think of and the Pixie didn't call screaming at us to stop. Even if nothing happens, it will be a fun night and Garrett seems more than pleased at the idea of flirting with you the way he was watching. Though with the way Jazz already reacted to it, shit will hit the fan pretty quick."

"He was just warning him about biting me Char."

She laughed, "Sugar he was warning him about touching you and I am guessing by that dark look about keeping his lust in check."

I blushed and dipped under the water. We swam a little more and then got out. I was in the best shape of my life hanging out here with Char, my body had toned and tightened and what curves remained I liked; they were feminine and soft.

We got out and let the sun dry our skin in the late afternoon heat. Then we got up and walked back home.

I got in my shower, god how I loved this shower, and relaxed under the multiple sprays. I wondered what to wear when the door opened and admitted Char. She held up a jean mini skirt and casual tank and left them on the toilet.

I got out and dried off dressing in the outfit she had provided. I didn't put on shoes or makeup except a little mascara and just ran my fingers through my long hair to make the waves sit well. Then I went back down the stairs. Char had beaten me down of course and was in an outfit similar to mine. I smiled at the boys and went straight to the kitchen with Char in tow. We made my supper as the boys played video games and watched us from the living area. I ate at the island with Char; as usual, she sat flipping through a magazine and pointing out pictures to me.

We talked about actors and movies and what to watch that night. Then Char lit up, "Oh, we should play a board game tonight, let's play Clue."

I suppressed a laugh, "Sure Char, that sounds like fun. What do you guys think?" I turned to them and they all agreed.

I went upstairs to have my post dinner human moment and came back down to see they had everything all set up.

"Have a good day Darlin?" Jazz asked as I sat next to him.

I nodded, "Si, gracias. ¿Y usted? ¿Tiene usted un buen día con los muchachos?" (Rough translation: Yes, thank you. And you? Did you have a good day with the boys?)

"Es bien. Su español está mejorando." (Rough translation: It was fine. Your Spanish is getting better."

"Gracias." I nodded and turned to the others.

"How long have you been learning Spanish Bella?" Garrett asked politely.

"Only six weeks. I can only say a few things so far."

"It sounds good."

"Thank you, Garrett."

We chatted and played the game, Peter won and got up and danced around the room making us all dance and Char jump up and turn on some music. She then pulled me to my feet and we began dancing around the room together.

I felt cold arms around me and turned in Garrett's arms, we began to sway together to the music.

"You smell divine Miss Bella."

I blushed, "I've been told."

He laughed, "Yes, your blood is very sweet but it is not only this."

I blushed again, "Thank you, I suppose."

He laughed and twirled me, "You are not afraid at all are you little one?"

"No, I'm not. Not here."

"And where are you afraid?"

I shrugged, "Out there, where the world and all its troubles wait."

"Ah, yes, but they can wait another day."

I laughed and nodded "That they can."

He moved us a little closer and then stilled for a moment at the sound of a low growl, I was sure to have missed if his step hadn't faltered in response, "Tell me Beauty, do you want to hide away in the woods forever?"

"Perhaps," I looked through my lashes "Where else would I go?"

He leaned in a little closer, "Wherever you wish Beauty, the world can be yours." We had stopped moving and stood close our heads bent together.

"And who will take me? If ever I wished to leave my paradise," I whispered.

"I would."

"Oh shit." I heard Peter curse and then Garrett was ripped away from me.

Jasper stood holding him by the throat his eyes a murderous black, "You dare touch what is mine." His voice was low and colder than ice.

"No Major, never," Garrett responded, dropping his head in a sign of submission.

"Major" Peter stepped closer to him and Jasper whipped his head around growling at him. Peter held his hands up in submission, gently pushing Char more behind him as he did. Her hands too were raised and her head tilted in submission.

"Jazz, Jasper," I whispered stepping closer to him.

"Stay back Beauty." Garrett said causing Jazz to snap his attention back the man he held by the throat. Garrett began to tremble, "Please, Major, I meant no harm"

"Jasper." I stepped forward again and laid my hand on his arm, "Please Jazz, let him go, he won't touch me again, it's okay."

His eyes turned to meet mine and I held them, I shifted in front of him and raised my hand up to meet his face, this was Jasper, I had no need to fear him, "Come on baby, let him go." I said sliding my other arm up his chest.

All around me the room was still; I think all the vampires had stopped breathing. "Please Major," I pleaded moving my body closer to his, pushing calm and love at him.

He dropped Garrett and pulled me to him, smelling my hair. Garrett slowly backed away to Peter and Char his hands up and his head down, still not breathing.

I heard movement and his head snapped back up to growl at Peter who immediately stopped.

I snuggled into his chest, pushing as much calm and love into him that I could. After a while, he pulled away from me and I looked into his eyes to the odd copper color they were supposed to be.

"I'm sorry." He said running his fingers along my jaw.

"Why?" I asked smiling up at him, "Nobody died."

Peter's booming laugh filled the air and we all relaxed a little more.

"Bella, I,"

"You what?"

"Nothing."

"Jazz?" I pushed confusion and love at him.

He gave me an odd look and pushed love back at me, it made me gasp with its intensity.

"Mate." He whispered barely audible to my ears.

"Mate." I said back, as I continued to feel wrapped in his love and pushed mine back at him.

"Is this what Alice saw?" He asked, I nodded, "Why didn't you tell me? Why didn't she?"

"I don't know, she told me not to, that you needed to figure it out, then she told me I could tell Char to get her to help force you to see and she called Garrett, really glad you didn't dismember him, by the way."

"And you signed up for that?" Jasper asked turning his head to Garrett.

"Owed Peter and Char one, besides was a pleasure to help you, she's easy to flirt with." Jasper growled at him and he held up his hands, "Just meant you're a lucky man is all and like she said, glad not to have been dismembered. I think I'll take my leave now though so it stays that way. You take care now Beauty. Char, Peter, I'll see you. He nodded at them before turning back to Jasper, Major." With that he was gone into the night."

Jasper turned his focus back to me, "You my mate will never do that again, or it might not end so peacefully."

"Lucky I have no need to." I assured him.

He leaned down and kissed me tentatively. Remembering Edward's response if I reacted I stayed as still as I could, fighting the urge to wrap my arms around him and deepen the kiss. He kissed me gently again and then ran his nose along my jaw, when he reached my ear he ran his cold tongue along the shell and I shivered, clenching my hands together to keep from grabbing him.

"I would never push you Bella. You have no need to be afraid."

"I'm not." I breathed.

"I can feel your nerves Darlin." He said amusement tingeing his voice.

"I want, I can't" I was practically panting with the effort not to pull him to me and kiss him deeply.

I felt calm seep into me, "What Darlin, What do you want? What can't you do?"

I bit my lip as tears formed, unable to articulate it to him, "Bella?" I could hear and feel his concern and it hit me, with Jazz, I didn't need the words. I pushed all the love and lust and longing I felt at him. He gasped and held me tighter for a moment. Then he pulled back and kissed me again, this time it was not tentative, this time it was nothing like the gentle pecks Edward had given me. His mouth crashed onto mine and his cold tongue ran along the seam of my mouth, when I gasped his tongue invaded my mouth, dancing with mine.

I felt him feeding my passion with his own and I kissed him back just as desperately. When he finally did pull back, he kissed my forehead and pulled me close to him again, we were both breathing heavily.

"You should get some rest now my mate." I shivered at his still low and dark tone, damn as if he needed to be any sexier.

"Will you sing to me?"

He didn't reply, instead he picked me up and carried me to my room. I went into the bathroom and changed into cotton boy shorts and a fitted tank and hurried out to my bed.

Jazz sat on the bed but a pained expression came over him and he shut his eyes, "Are you ok Jazz?" I asked sitting on the bed near him.

"Yes." His voice was gruff.

"Jasper?"

"It was hard enough fighin it before is all Darlin."

I stared at him, sending him my curiosity.

He sent me back a dose of lust that curled my toes.

Surprise filled me and then my own lust.

He groaned, "Please Darlin, my control is not that good."

"Sorry" I murmured looking at my hands.

Jasper pulled me into his lap; his nose ran along the back of my neck sending shivers through me, "Don't be. I love that you want me; every time I felt a wisp of lust from you I marveled it could be for me, now I know you are my mate it is harder not to take you but I will be strong Isabella. I will not touch you until you are ready."

My body stiffened in surprise, was he saying?

"Rest Darlin, there is time tomorrow to talk." He settled me back in his arms so we both reclined on the bed and he began to sing and push calm and relaxation into me. I quickly drifted to sleep.

When I woke I was cold and laying on something very hard, but I was oddly comfortable and relaxed.

"Morning Darlin." I jumped at his voice realizing I slept against Jaspers granite and ice form.

"Sorry Jazz," I said blushing, "Have you been here all night."

"Don't be sorry, I wanted to stay with you and my mind was busy."

"What were you thinking about?"

"Many things," he said looking at me, I began to feel lust projected off him and blushed. "Go do your human thing and eat with Charlotte, but after, you're mine today."

I nodded, "Alright Jasper."

After finishing the delicious crepes Charlotte had made and helping her clean the kitchen I went up to brush my teeth and see what Jazz wanted to do. I had put on short jean shorts and a tank top and as usual in the house, was barefoot.

Jasper was waiting for me in the chair in my room when I came out of the bathroom, "You should bring your swim suit, we will stop at the lake for a swim." I nodded and grabbed my suit going back to the bathroom to put it on under my shorts.

When I came out I followed him downstairs and outside, he took my hand in his as we walked into the woods.

"Your balance has gotten better since we moved here." He commented as we walked.

"I think it is all the yoga, it's been great for my flexibility to." His hand tightened around mine for a minute but loosened again as we continued walking.

"Jasper, are you really ok?"

"He is to close to the surface Bella, he wants to claim you."

"Oh. Um. Jazz?"

He turned to look at me, lifting one of his brows and sending curiosity for me to continue.

"Will you?" I asked blushing furiously.

"Not until you are ready." His grip tightened on my hand again and I felt a surge of anger before he reined it in; "Did you and my brother ever?"

"No." I reassured him squeezing his hand, "He barely kissed me, I didn't know you could kiss me the way you did, he was always so careful."

"I would never hurt you. I have been alive a lot longer than him and would not unintentionally injure you."

I nodded and we continued walking, "What if I am ready now?" I asked him quietly.

He jerked us to a stop and stood staring at me, I could tell he was searching through all my emotions.

His eyes had darkened and he let go of my hand to rub it over my face, "Have you ever, has anyone ever," he growled and I saw his fists clench as his eyes darkened a little further.

"Jasper?" I asked stepping closer to him and laying a hand on his chest.

"Before my brother was there, has there ever been"

"A boyfriend?" I finished for him; he nodded his eyes almost black now.

I shook my head, "No Jazz, until your brother I had not even kissed a boy and I already told you that was little more than a meeting of lips.

His body relaxed a little but his eyes were still very dark, "Mine" he said pulling me to him he lowered his head, "Mate." He claimed before kissing me senseless. My knees were weak as he held me up, our tongues dancing and exploring.

"Isabella." He growled pulling away from my mouth and trailing kisses along my jaw before dropping his head to kiss up my bare shoulder to my pulse point, my heart skipped as he placed a kiss over my jugular, he sucked gently.

"Jasper." I practically moaned, "Please." I sent him all the lust, every ounce I had bottled over the last few months, he sucked harder on my neck and shifted my body closer to his, I could feel his erection through his jeans and moaned rubbing against him.

His mouth left my neck and he lifted me so my legs wrapped around his waist and kissed me again. I ground myself against him, his eyes were pitch black and he let a low growl, it sent fresh heat through me.

After that first time in the woods things settled into a routine again. This time, things were a little crazy but I couldn't have been happier. Jasper and I were always together now except those few hours in the morning Char and I kept to ourselves, we would all spend a large amount of the day together but after supper Jazz and I would go upstairs and read together or talk for hours and every morning I woke up to new delicious aches. I was finally able to kiss and lick every scar on his body. I couldn't get enough of him. Peter and Char were pleased for us and for themselves as he had a little trouble projecting when we were together.

It was intense and at times I was a little afraid because of it. When he went hunting I felt anxious and sat on the porch waiting for him. I couldn't sleep unless I fell asleep in his arms. He had to know where I was all the time and monitored my emotions carefully questioning any slight alteration in my mood until I snapped at him and he would growl at me. Alice called and told me to have faith that things would settle and be good soon. I believed her. She was never wrong.

Summer faded into fall and the intensity did begin to fade. I still slept poorly when he wasn't there when I went to sleep, but he could leave me to hunt and I would be fine with Char for a few hours and he stopped searching my emotions so intently.

As winter approached things fell into a similar routine from before he learned I was his mate, we spent a little more time together and were always touching, not to mention the sex, screw the whole god of war image my mate was the god of sex.

Char and I did up the cabin for Christmas, Peter even cut down a big tree for us to decorate. It was a fun night of Christmas carols and hot chocolate, for me. It was almost perfect. Almost. Jasper was a bit distant, had been for the last few days.

"Jazz?" I caught his attention and pushed confusion and worry to him. He sent me back calm as he had the last few times I enquired about his mood. I decided to try a different tactic. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing." He answered shrugging, "do you want more cocoa?"

"I sent him annoyance, "Jasper" I sent more worry, questioning him again.

"I'm going to hunt." He said standing up. He came over and kissed my temple before disappearing into the night. I bit back tears and felt small cold arms wrap around me.

"It's alright sugar. He's fine. Really."

"He's not fine." I snapped at her pushing her away.

"Alright, he's not but he will be."

"Why wont he tell me what's bothering him? Is it me? Did I do something?"

"No, well yes."

I frowned at her trying not to cry. "Oh sugar, please don't cry, I didn't mean it like that. He's not upset with you. He loves you."

"Then what, please Char, you have to tell me." I pleaded with her my voice cracking.

"He doesn't want to push you Shug, we want you to be happy, he's just scared is all."

"Doesn't want to push me about what? What is he scared of? Does he want to leave? Go back to the Cullen's? I know he misses them but I thought he was happy here too."

"He is happy here, he doesn't want to go anywhere. In fact he was hoping to settle here for a year or two."

"Well then what's wrong? Is James getting close?"

"No, sugar, we can protect you from James if he ever does show up."

"Charlotte, please, just tell me what's wrong with him."

"Nothing, Bella, nothing is wrong with him. He just loves you that's all and it's hard for him."

"It's hard for him to love me?"

"Yes, no, well." She sighed, "I should not be having this conversation with you. He should be but he doesn't want you to feel pressured. I don't either. We would never do that but have you even thought about it?"

"Thought about what Char?"

"The change."

"What about it? Is that why he's upset? He doesn't want to change me? Is he afraid he won't stop because I know he will, he won't kill me."

"No sugar, he wants to change you, badly." She sighed again. "You are just so breakable Bella. You caught that cold last month and he was terrified, I know it was only a day and a half but you were sick and he felt helpless. Everyday he thinks of a new and terrifying way that you can get hurt. I used to too when we first started spending so much time together, you are my only friend Bella, my sister and your mortality scares me, it terrifies Jasper."

"So he wants to change me? He's upset because he's scared I'll die before he does?" she nodded. "Then why hasn't he said anything? Brought it up ever?"

"I told you, he doesn't want to pressure you. It has to be your choice. He's waiting for you to go to him and he will wait sugar so long as you want him to, he wont change you at all if you don't want."

"Of course I want him to change me, I just, well I didn't think he would and I didn't want to fight about it. I figured Alice would just come and do it because she already saw me as a vampire."

"Why would you think he wouldn't want to?"

"I just, well, I" because Edward didn't want me, but I wasn't his mate, I was Jasper's and he loved me, "I guess I was just waiting for him to bring it up. To say he wanted to be with me forever."

"He does sugar." She pulled me back into her arms for a cold hug, "Peter and I want it to. You're our family, forever."

I curled up in the chair in his office and fell asleep waiting for him. I woke when he lifted me to carry me to bed.

"Thank you Jazz." I mumbled snuggling closer to him.

"Why didn't you go to bed?"

"Waiting for you to sing to me." I told him kissing his jaw.

He began to hum quietly as he settled us onto my bed.

I felt my eyes drooping as I listened for a minute.

"Jazz?"

"Hmm?" He sent me a tiny bit of curiosity.

"You know I love you." I sent the emotion to compliment my words and felt it come back to me even stronger. "I always want to be with you." I felt his love surge a little into me and knew he was saying he wanted me with him too. "Forever." I whispered and felt him stiffen a little around me.

"Bella, I" he sighed, "Charlotte should not have said anything to you."

"I'm glad she did, though I wish you just had."

"It can wait."

"Why?"

"I wont do anything to hurt you." He said kissing my head and humming again, "I'll keep you safe until its time."

"You're scared you wont be able to though right, that's why you are upset."

"I can keep you safe, I promise."

"I know you can Jazz but you are still worried."

"It doesn't matter."

"It does."

"Bella."

"Do you love me? Forever I mean; do you want me with you forever? Am I really your mate?"

He growled lightly at me, and his arms tightened, "You are my mate. I love you. I want you. Forever. Why would you question that?"

"Why would you?"

"Bella?"

"I love you Jazz. I want to be with you forever. You knew I wanted to change long before we were together, that Alice saw it happen, why would you think I didn't want that now?"

"That was with my brother."

"You are my mate Jasper. I love you. I am with you. I want to be with you. Forever. I want to be changed. If I had thought you would give that to me I would have asked after that first time in the woods."

"Why would you think I wouldn't?"

"You never mentioned turning me. Just like your brother didn't want to talk about it. I didn't want to fight about it so I figured Alice would come and do it. I'd rather it was you but I was sure you would have brought it up if it was what you wanted."

"I am not my brother." He growled.

"No, you are my mate and never brought up the future. Not once. We exist here in this bubble, days fading into each other, never talking about tomorrow, about anything real outside our bubble." I sent him frustration.

"I didn't want to pressure you."

"Fine, instead you shut me out and refused to talk to me."

"We're talking now."

"Because Char told me what was bothering you, you didn't."

"Fine. Yes, I want to change you. It scares me how many ways there are for you to get hurt and that I might not be there when you do or you might get sick and be to far from the doctor. I want to make you one of us, a Whitlock, a vampire. I want to know you are mine for eternity, unbreakable and strong."

"Then turn me."

"This is not a small thing Isabella. All the things you would be giving up, you haven't thought of all the consequences and I wont have you resent me for killing you."

"What consequences Jasper? Never seeing my family again? To late, Alice already took care of that. Drinking blood? Got over the idea ages ago. I'll eat like you, half veggie and half criminals. Live with you forever nineteen? No downside there, mate. So what? Tell me Jasper, what consequence would I resent you for?"

"Children Bella, vampires can't have babies."

"And that is different from now how? Here with you, human, I can't have babies any more than I can when I am changed."

"You could still have them though, if you wanted."

I snorted. "How? Artificial insemination? And tell me Jazz how would we raise a baby?"

"You could do it," his arm squeezed, "with another man, a better one, a human one, have a normal life."

I snorted again, "there is no better man Jazz, human or vampire and I have never been normal. Besides, you'd kill any man who got within thinking about touching distance, how would you expect me to get pregnant?" I teased him a little before speaking seriously again, "I never thought about having kids Jazz, never really cared about having them and if I cant have them with you then I don't want them. All I need to be happy is you. Forever."

"You think that now but in the future."

"In the future you will still be my mate and I will still want nothing so much as I want to be with you, forever. Besides we could always adopt like Esme or just come stay with Peter, that man is like a large child and will kill any growing desire for them."

"This shouldn't be a rash decision."

"It's not and I'm not asking you to do it now but I have thought about it. I knew I wanted to change long ago and from Alice I knew it would happen. I want this, I want you to change me."

"When you are ready, I will." He sighed, "I feel better just knowing you will let me. However long it takes, it's ok, as long as you do want it."

"I do, and I don't want to wait, I want to start our life together Jazz."

"Now?"

"Not tonight. After Christmas though, I want to start the New Year in our new life."

"If you are sure, then I will change you New Years."

"No, I mean yes I am sure but I want to be changed by then." I felt a swirl of excitement as I thought about it, "Yes I want to wake up to a New Year and a new me. I want you to bite me just after midnight on the 29th."

We agreed on the plan and I had eight days of humanity left. I ate all my favorite foods and we celebrated Christmas. Peter and Charlotte counted down to midnight with a chiming clock and on the first stoke of midnight Jasper kissed my jugular and bit, he bit me several more times at different pulse points until the final stoke of midnight when he placed the final bite over my heart.

I didn't scream. I lay there burning and thought on my mate. I ran through my other memories that I wanted to keep as they had counseled but mostly I just thought of Jasper.

Finally, I heard three voices counting down the New Year above me, my heart beating frantically. On the last stroke, my heart beat for the last time. A few moments later, I opened my eyes to a New Year, a new world and a new me.

Being a newborn wasn't as bad as I thought. I was easily distracted, more often then not by Jasper, I found my lust for him was stronger than before, often stronger than my blood lust, which was shockingly low.

My first kill was messy, my first few kills were but I finally got the hang of it. After three months, we went to the outskirts of a city where I tested my lust near humans. It was difficult. I turned and ran after only a few minutes. The next night I was able to stay half an hour. The next two hours. When I could finally spend a full night walking among the people I was treated to my first taste of human blood as Jazz taught me to hunt our natural prey. My eyes had faded from the blood red to the yellow orange and now they were the same fiery copper as Jazz. The months passed winter turning to spring and then summer and fall. We celebrated the New Year and the end of my first year as a newborn and again winter turned to spring and began to warm to summer.

I answered Jazz's ringing phone without looking. Peter and Char were the only ones who called us. I missed them. They had left us several weeks ago for new hunting grounds. I was hoping they found a house soon. I was ready for my family to be together again. Not that I minded all the alone time with Jazz. I loved that. Of course, he was off hunting with Garret who had come for a short stay. He had whistled once when he saw me, and once I had calmed Jasper down everything was fine. Since my turning Jasper was more relaxed in his own skin. Charlotte said it was because I allowed him to break down the wall locking away the God of War and embrace all aspects of himself. He was deadly, dangerous, sexy and mine. That was all I knew or cared about.

"Hello?"

"Bella?"

"Who's this?" I asked confused at the female voice that was not Char. I pulled the phone away and looked at the caller id, seeing the name at the same time the voice replied.

"Alice."

"Oh Alice. It's been so long. How are you?" I felt venom well up in my eyes.

"Good, I miss you still."

"I miss you to."

"Enough to come home?"

"Home?" To me home was this cabin.

"It's time Bella. We aren't in Forks anymore. Obviously. Actually, I just moved back with the Cullen's recently. We are in Canada. I'll text the address. Jasper will be back with Garrett soon and you can call Charlotte and Peter when we hang up though they wont come, they are going to find a beautiful house for all of you and Char will want to stay to decorate it. You'll arrive Thursday if you agree to come, which you will."

"Right," I laughed, "Haven't bet against you yet so I suppose I'll see you on Thursday."

"You are so beautiful Bella. Just like knew you would be."

I laughed again, "I missed you Pixie."

"Missed you to sister."

We hung up the phone and I called Peter and Charlotte. They had two more houses to look at, I knew one of them would be the one so I told them Jazz and I would be fine on our own, we'd go for our visit and meet them a little later than originally planned.


	3. Chapter 3

**Disclaimer – I do not own Twilight. All recognizable plot and characters belong to the talented Stephanie Meyer.**

**Please review!**

After I hung up with Char, Jasper and Garrett got back. We packed up to drive deciding to take a couple days detour to drive Garrett to Philadelphia and then on to see the Cullen's. Alice, as usual was right. We arrived early in the morning on Thursday.

She was waiting on the patio.

She ran down the steps and hugged me, "The family are all out hunting, I didn't tell them you were coming." She quickly moved to Jasper and hugged him tightly. I felt a quick stab of pain but it was gone in an instant.

She led us into the house and up the stairs, "Esme did rooms for you both. Bella yours is here beside mine. Jazz yours is upstairs, she did the attic up for you." I looked over at Jazz and towards the door she had pointed to. We had shared a room since the first time he claimed me as a human.

"Oh, I know you share but they don't know and they don't know you aren't human any more."

"Do they know anything?" I asked her as we continued walking up the stairs to the attic.

"They know only what you told them. I only just returned myself the day before I called you."

"Where were you Ali?" Jasper asked as he looked around the den Esme had made up for him.

"Europe. Shopping, travelling, you know." She shrugged.

"Looking for your mate?" I asked, wanting just a little to remind them both that whatever their history Jasper was my mate.

"Partly. I know it's not time yet but it is where I will meet him. Do you like the room Jazzy? I helped Esme design it. Your room to Bella, its more of a bedroom though since Esme believed you would need a place to actually sleep and I figured you'd both want a bed anyhow."

"Thank you Alice." I walked over to the window and looked out into the woods trying to quash the jealousy and pain in my heart.

"They're coming. We should go downstairs. It will be an interesting reunion."

We went to the living room and a moment later, several vampires entered, I recognized all but one, a pretty, petite black-haired girl, I thought she must be Edward's mate.

"Jasper?" Carlisle stepped forward first. "Welcome home son."

"Oh Jazz." Esme rushed forward and pulled him into a hug.

Only one had noticed me in the corner, "Bella?" Rosalie's voice stilled them all as they turned to focus on me.

I nodded once to her, "hello." I said stepping forward.

"You bastard!" Edward growled and attacked Jasper.

Bad idea, really bad idea, Jasper had him pinned to the ground in less than an instant. "Do not forget who I am." He growled at Edward who was still spitting obscenities. The others stood stunned, still staring at either them or me.

"Let him up Jazz." I said as I stepped close and lay my hand on his back. Instantly he was off his brother though he stood a little in front of me, eyeing all the others warily.

"Slipped again Jasper. Tell me how many have you killed since leaving? I'm surprised your eyes aren't blood red." Edward spat.

"He hasn't slipped Edward and neither have I, ever, what we choose to hunt is our own business." I informed him icily turning towards the other Cullen's, "I'm sorry we've just turned up, I didn't realize Alice didn't mention our visit until after we arrived. We'll get a hotel in town."

"No. You are our children, you'll stay here, I already have rooms for you. We are just surprised to see you is all. Happy but surprised." Esme said stepping past Jasper to hug me.

"How long since you were turned?" Carlisle asked stepping nearer to us as well.

"A year and a half. Jazz turned me New Years before last. Or rather I woke just after midnight that New Year."

"Why?" Rose asked. I heard no animosity in her voice as I had expected so I answered honestly and without thought.

"He is my mate, it's what we both wanted."

I heard growls and hissing as Edward attacked Jasper again. This time his teeth made contact before Jazz put him down nearly tearing off his arm as he twisted it behind him and put Edward on the ground.

"You turned her you fucking bastard you could have killed her. You were supposed to protect her not steal her fucking life!" He spat still struggling. "She isn't yours she was never yours, you're a fucking monster, a murderer, I wont let you near her!"

Jasper growled at him and I hissed.

"Enough." Carlisle's voice was low but strong and authoritative. Edward immediately stilled. "Jasper let him go." Jazz growled low again.

"Jazz," I touched his back again and he was instantly standing and pulling me into his arms. He hissed as I licked the spot on his arm Edward had bitten, sealing the wound with my venom. "I'm sorry Carlisle, we'll go."

"No. Bella, you and Jasper are part of this family. You have been gone long enough." Carlisle smiled at me.

"Yeah, it's about damn time you came home and damn lil sis you turned into a hot vamp." Emmett said pulling me into a hug.

I laughed and hugged him back, "I missed you too Em."

"Rosalie." I nodded to her and we exchanged a small smile.

"This is Edward's mate, Sora." Alice introduced the petite black haired girl.

"Hello," I turned to her, "I'm Bella McCarty, this is my mate Jasper Whitlock." This started Edward and thus Jazz to growl again.

"Hello." She returned in a small voice standing very near but slightly behind Edward.

"Did you say McCarty?" Emmitt asked loudly.

If I had been human I would be blushing, "Hope you don't mind brother bear."

He pulled me into another big hug "mind? Hell no! This is great. My sister Bella McCarty!"

I laughed, "Except technically you and Rosalie are Cullen's."

His face fell a moment before he turned to Rosalie, "Rosie?"

"No."

"But baby, please, I have a sister now."

"What am I chopped liver?" Alice asked jokingly.

"A Cullen. Bells is a McCarty, it's different."

I laughed again, "Glad you approve Em but I wont be a McCarty much longer."

"You wont? Why not? It shouldn't be time for you to need to change it yet." He seemed sad and a little concerned.

I smiled at him, "it's not really but Jazz and I are getting married so I'll be a Whitlock."

"You're getting married? I didn't see that yet." Alice said stunned.

"Well we haven't decided much about it for you to see besides that it would happen." She and Jazz exchanged a quick look and I wondered if she was upset about the lack of vision or the wedding and if maybe Jazz hadn't wanted me to say anything.

"Congratulations." Rosalie broke the silence that had descended.

"Thank you."

Edward and Jazz were growling at each other again.

"Come on Jazz, I need to hunt." I pulled his arm.

"You're mixing your diet?" there was no censure in Carlisle's voice, only curiosity and I was grateful.

"Yes. Mostly we stay veggie though we indulge at the occasional hospice or on criminals when we visit the city. We wont do so here."

"Thank you." He nodded at us.

"I'll freshen up your rooms." Esme smiled at us both. "When you get back we will have lots to catch up on."

I smiled at her, "Thank you Esme."

"Come on, I'll show you the best spot." Emmett grinned.

I laughed, "Didn't you just come back from hunting?"

"Yeah but I never saw you do it before. You were all breakable with a beating heart last time you were here."

"Right, well then lets go." I said laughing at him again.

I followed him out and when I looked back, I saw Jazz running with Alice. I felt the sharp sting in my heart again.

I caught a scent and went off to hunt. I could sense Emmett watching me. When I had my fill, we wrestled a little. Jasper had taught me to fight so while Emmett was stronger, I was faster. When we headed back to the house Jazz and Alice had not come back yet. I went to my room where I was surprised to find Rosalie waiting for me.

"Rosalie?"

"Rose." She corrected. "Family calls me Rose."

I was surprised; she had never liked me, "Alright Rose then. How are you?"

"Fine. You and Jazz here long?"

"I don't know."

"The family missed you, both of you."

"We missed the family."

"What happened with the hunter?"

"James? I don't know. He never came for me. Now I am a vampire anyways so I suppose he's no longer a threat."

"Right. Should have done that back then I suppose."

"I was under the impression my becoming a member of the family was something you would not want. Edward certainly didn't."

"I have nothing against you personally, except for the fact that you not only had the one thing I wanted but you also just wanted to throw it all away. Edward is different, he was concerned about damning your soul."

"That's ridiculous, my soul isn't damned and none of yours are either."

"It is what he believes Bella."

"And you? What did I have you wanted?"

"Life, mortality, the ability to have a child."

"I have more of a life as a vampire than before. It is full of love and learning and laughter. Mortality is not all it's cracked up to be, I mean why settle for one life time with the love of your life when you can have eternity? I never wanted babies. I was more the mother than my mother growing up. All I wanted, all I want is to love and be loved. For me it is enough. I'm sorry that you can't have them but I would not have had them even if I had stayed human."

"You might change your mind."

"In a few decades if not centuries when it would have been to late if I had been human and love will always be enough for me."

"So you're with Jazz now."

I respected her desire to change the subject; babies were one thing we would not agree on. "He is my mate."

"How? When?"

"Alice told me at the hotel in Phoenix before sending me away with him. He figured it out the following summer and I was changed that winter. It was easy to love him. I love him more every day."

"Over a year and a half why not come back earlier if James was no threat?"

"I was a strange new born when it came to blood lust but I was still a new born. It was wise to stay in one place. We were happy and unsure of our welcome."

"So why turn up now?"

"Alice called. We thought she would have told you all she asked us here."

"Do you still love Edward?"

"No. I'm not entirely sure I really did love him. It was certainly nothing like what I feel for Jazz."

"He looks different."

"I suppose he is."

"I'm going to find Emmett."

"Alright."

"Bella?"

"Yes Rose?"

"I'm sorry I was not nice to you before."

"It's in the past."

"I'd hoped we could start over."

I smiled at her, "we have."

"Welcome home then Bella. It's good to have another sister." She said as she walked out the door.

"Thank you Rose." I called after her.

I went to shower and change my clothes before going to find Carlisle.

He and Esme were in his office.

"Bella, come in." he said smiling warmly at me.

Esme pulled me into a hug, "You are so beautiful my daughter. Not that you were not lovely as a human of course."

"Thank you Esme." I hugged her back before stepping away.

"It's good to have you home Bella, we've all missed you." Carlisle added opening his arms for me to step in and hug him as well.

When I stepped away from him, I knew they would see the venom in my eyes, tears I would never spill, "I missed you both, I'm sorry we didn't come sooner."

"It is the past and you are here now." Esme smiled at me.

"How was your first year?"

"Unusual, or so Jazz, Peter and Char tell me."

"How so?" he asked settling down again in a chair and motioning me to the opposite one as Esme sat beside him.

"Little to no blood lust. I was easily distracted from my thirst by…" I would have been fuchsia at this point had I been human still, "I was also very calm for a new born, not as quick to anger, Peter said I was much to rational to be a new born and Jazz must have lost his touch and changed me wrong. I kicked his butt in an arm wrestle with my newborn strength and that shut him up at least for a day or so."

"Any powers?"

"Peter says I'm a shield, powerful to since Edward couldn't read me as a human. I naturally block most powers unless I think about letting them in. I block Jazz now but Alice still seems to get visions, when I was first changed she called to say her visions for me were a bit fuzzy. Jazz thinks I subconsciously let her see us because I know she is looking out for us but I don't know. Peter still just knows shit about us."

"Do you shield Jasper as well?"

"Mostly. I can also shield Peter and Char but for Jazz, I tend to do it without thinking much, like with myself. Char says its because he is my mate and thus an extension of me. None of us really know anything though."

"Where are Peter and Charlotte? Will they be joining us?" Esme broke in.

"They were house hunting when Alice called. Char is now renovating and decorating our new house in Massachusetts."

"You wont be staying with us then?" Esme looked heart broken.

"I'm not sure that is a good idea Esme but we don't need to make a decision right away. We missed you. I'm still not sure why Alice asked us to come. We are very glad she has but we have yet to talk about how long we would stay. We were not entirely certain of our welcome here."

"You are always welcome here Bella. You will always have a place with the family. Both of you." I might have expected this from warm-hearted Esme; from Carlisle, it brought tears to my eyes.

"Thank you." I whispered.

"Do you like your room?"

"It's lovely, thank you Esme."

"I did one for Jasper as well. I didn't realize you might be sharing."

"They are both lovely rooms Esme. We both appreciate your work." She beamed at me.

"Bells! Come play with me!" Emmett called from the living room. "I have the new Mario Cart!"

"Coming Em." I returned just a little louder than my normal speaking voice. I turned back to my adopted parents.

They just smiled at me and waved me off to Emmett. "Go play with your brother, we'll talk more later."

Emmett and I played several rounds of Mario cart. Rose had come down to sit in a nearby chair and flip through a magazine.

"Are you guys back in high school? I asked finally setting my controller down.

"Nah, we're in college this time." Rose said flipping her magazine onto the table. "I'm taking mechanical engineering and Emmitt is taking business technology. Sora is studying literature and youth education and Edward is back in pre-med. Even Esme is taking classes in horticulture. Carlisle is working at a free clinic in Toronto."

"Sora is a pretty name."

"It's Japanese. She was a young geisha changed in pre-second world war Japan, I think she was sixteen."

"Almost seventeen." The quiet voice interceded as she came floating into the room.

"My name means sky because my eyes were unnaturally blue like a rare sunny day in winter and I was born in the element of the air."

"It's lovely."

"Thank you. I like yours as well, it is I believe Italian for beautiful, very fitting."

"Bella is yes but my name is actually Isabella."

"A beautiful name nonetheless."

"Thank you. How long have you been with the Cullen's?"

"I met Edward twenty two months ago, he brought me to the Cullen's two months later in October."

I was shocked. He'd have found her less then a month after our one and only phone conversation.

"Why did you and Jasper stay away so long?"

"I was in danger and then Jazz turned me."

"Yes Edward was not pleased. He cares very much for all his family and would not wish any of you to suffer. I am not sure I agree that we are soulless since we can love so deeply and know right from wrong. If Jasper changed you to keep you safe I am sure it was for the best."

"He changed me because he loves me. Edward is not pleased because he didn't get his way. I chose Jasper and he hates that."

"You are his beloved sister and Jasper is a dangerous vampire. Edward has told me his history and seeing him attack my mate this morning I can see the truth of it, it is also in his eyes. Yours as well though this, Edward assures me is Jasper's doing. Here with the family we will support you and change this evil."

Rose and I were both growling at her angrily.

"Jasper is only dangerous to those who are a threat or stupid enough to go against us. Edward attacked us, Jasper acted in defense. There is nothing wrong with our eyes either. They reflect the choice of our life style not evil."

"Killing innocent people is evil. It tarnishes your soul."

"According to Edward I haven't got one to tarnish! Regardless we do not hunt the innocent. We hunt criminals. Sometimes we help the dying move on, taking away their pain and suffering, we do this to nourish ourselves and as a kindness to them." I spat back at her.

"Who are you to judge people? And we can nourish ourselves without the cost of human life. That is the point, Jasper has led you into the darkness but you do not have to live like that, we can teach you to live only on animals."

"Jasper has not led me anywhere, I chose my diet. If I wanted to eat solely animals or feed entirely on human life, he would respect my choice. Who are you to judge us?"

"I am the mate of your brother who loves you. I want only to help you."

"Edward is not my brother and I do not need nor want your help." I spat at her.

"Is that was he told you? That she was his sister?" Rose sneered at her. "She was his girlfriend, he isn't angry Jasper stole her soul he's jealous he stole her heart and envious that he fucks her while Eddie never got more than a kiss. Edward is the reason she was hiding; he brought her into our world, made her vulnerable to our kind and refused to change her. Jasper protected and loved her. My brother is a better man then your mate Sora and I will not listen to you spew out whatever bullshit Eddie feeds you about him."

I almost felt bad for her as I saw the venom pool in her eyes before she turned and fled the room.

"Thank you Rose." I nodded to her for her defense and left the room. I went outside to the porch and sat on a deck chair. Jasper and Alice had been gone for many hours. It was almost another again before I saw them come out of the woods running towards the house, there was an ache in my heart that would not go away even with my mate now by my side.

"We went inside to watch a movie with the rest of the family. Neither Edward nor Sora had returned."

After the movie, I went to my room and pulled out a book. Jasper followed me but after looking in on me reading, he disappeared again. I heard him and Carlisle talking about my change and the differences in me as a new born and refocused on my book. I read until I had finished it and dawn's first rays peaked inside. I got up and went to find my mate. He was in his den sitting at his desk looking over some papers. When I entered, he set them in a drawer and stood.

"What shall you do today?" he asked coming over to me and kissing my temple.

It did not escape me that he said you rather than we. It was rare we spent the day apart unless he was hunting with Peter.

I shrugged, "You?"

"Emmett wants to hunt bear and have a fight. Later I will play chess with Rose."

I nodded, "perhaps I will go to town and get some new books. I'd like to see the city and the university."

"Would you like to go there?"

"Are we staying here that long?"

He looked away from me, "We can leave whenever you desire to go."

I felt my heart clench and flitted past him and out the door, "I'll see you later Jasper." It was the first time I left him or he left me without a kiss. It was the first time in a long time we had not spent the night together. Only one other night had we spent apart, when he and Peter had been arrested and Char and I had to wait until morning to bail them out.

I sped out of the house and into the woods; I quickly hunted and returned to the house to shower and change. The house was empty but for Rose working on Emmett's truck and Esme who happily lent me her car to drive into the city.

I drove into Toronto and went to a bookstore but even the shelves of books gave me no comfort. I wandered up and down the aisles for a couple hours before selecting three and paying. Next, I walked to the university and wandered the campus. When I returned home it was just starting to get dark. Jasper was playing chess with Rosalie who sat in Emmett's lap as he alternately watched her playing and the muted baseball game playing on the TV. Alice was shopping online with a laptop on the sofa behind where Jasper sat on the floor. Carlisle was reading a large old text with Esme curled into his side knitting hats for the cancer patients at the clinic. Edward played the piano and Sora sat with him, singing softly. They looked like a perfect and content family. My heart ached painfully.

Jasper looked up from his game over to me and I felt a small surge of confusion, for a moment, I wondered if he read me but my shield was still up. It was rare that I did not understand the emotional questions or statements he sent me instead of speaking.

"How was your day Bella?" Esme asked looking up from her knitting.

"Fine, thanks."

"Did you visit the campus? Jazz said you were going to have a look and see if you might want to attend with us." Rose added, moving one of her pieces.

"I didn't graduate high school." I reminded her a little sharply, adding in a much nicer tone, "It is a beautiful school though."

"We can get you the proper documentation if you like or you can enroll in senior year at a high school in the area." Carlisle said smiling at me as well.

"Not right now thank you." I told him, turning and leaving the room. I went up to my room but felt to restless so I jumped out the window and jogged into the woods.

I found a spot on a large rock beside a stream, climbing up it I sat and watched the water moving below me. After a moment, I felt the presence of another and knew I was not alone.

"What do you want?" I asked sighing at the loss of my peace.

"Just to talk to you."

"Edward?"

"Yes."

"What is there to talk about?"

"I did not behave well when I learned of your change."

I snorted, "No, not really."

"I wanted more for you than this life love."

"Do not call me that Edward. According to Sora I am nothing but your sister and a brother does not call his sister such things."

"Are you jealous?"

I wondered if that was hope I heard in his voice, "no, but I will not lie for you. Rose told her already anyways. I simply do not wish for you to call me that. We have been parted for three years and what we had was not really love."

"What you have with Jasper is?"

I nodded, "He is my mate."

"Is that why he ran off with Alice so fast? Why you have spent so much time together since you arrived here?"

"He missed Emmett and Rose, I am happy he has spent the day with them. Emmett and I had time together yesterday."

"You mean he spent some time with them. He spent most of the day off with Alice again or didn't you know?"

The ache in my chest felt like a vice around my heart. "What do you want Edward?"

"Why him?"

"I love him."

"Why? You had loved me."

"I thought I did. Alice told me we were not meant to be together. That you would find Sora and that Jasper was my true mate. I didn't believe her at first but loving him was easy. He's a good man; he's my warrior, my protector, my companion and lover. Just because you do not approve of the way we choose to live does not give you the right to judge us for it."

"Sora did not mean to speak out of turn, what she knows of you and Jasper she knows from a time when I was still very hurt and angry."

"It was still not her place to speak such things."

"She only wants to become your friend. Rose is not kind to her. Alice has only just come and they have not become fast friends. Esme is the only one Sora has any bond with."

"Attacking my mate and disparaging my life style are not ways to ingratiate herself to me. If she speaks with such judgment to all I am not surprised Rose is unkind to her after all Rose is not one to wear kid gloves when it comes to her opinions."

"She did not mean to come across as condescending Bella. She only wants to help you. To be your friend."

"I do not need help and if she wants to be my friend she had best learn not to be so judgmental." I snapped at him, my anger having grown.

"Please Bella. I don't wish to fight with you. I came to make peace. To be sure you were alright."

"Of course I am."

"Edward?" we heard Sora's voice through the trees.

"We are here sweetheart." He called out to her.

"Good evening Bella." She said hesitating at the edge of the trees before moving to stand next to Edward.

"Sora"

"I am sorry for my words before. I had no right to speak as I did."

"You're forgiven." I nodded to her with a small smile.

"Are you alright?"

"Yes. I wished only for a peaceful moment to myself and found it to confining in my room."

"We did not mean to intrude then." She bowed slightly.

"It's alright." I smiled at her again.

"I am here if you would like to talk, I do not judge, though my earlier actions do not support this, it is true. I can be a very good listener."

"Thank you, but there is nothing."

"It really doesn't bother you then?"

"What?"

"Jasper running off with Alice for so long."

I shook my head, "I trust my mate." I felt a twinge in my heart again, something telling me something was not right.

"You do not mind that they are still married?" Sora asked; her head tilted to the side.

My breath stopped as my heart dropped in my chest. "My relationship with my mate is not your concern and I do not wish to speak of it with you."

"Bella," Edward began, but I cut him off.

"Edward, we dated once very briefly, neither of you have made any secret of your feelings on my relationship I do not wish to speak of it with you. Please respect that."

He nodded, shutting his mouth. "I came out here to be alone, if you don't mind I'll go for a run now."

They both nodded and I jogged off into the night. It was nearing dawn when I returned to the house, another night away from my mate. I went up to Jasper's den but he was not there. I went to his desk and opened the side drawer, inside was the papers he had put away when I entered the day before. I opened the folder. Inside were a few photos of him and Alice and a marriage certificate, a valid marriage certificate. I flitted through the papers looking for divorce papers. There were none. I put away the papers and went down to the sitting room. No one was around. I went upstairs and showered. When I was dressed, I went back down and saw Esme in the garden.

"Esme? Where is Jazz?"

"He and Alice went out a little while ago dear. I'm sure he has his cell phone."

I felt like I had been punched in the gut. The vice around my heart locking at its tightest. I pushed out my shield cementing it in place. I turned and went into the house. I went back up to his den and slipped the ring off my left hand and left it in the center of his desk. I borrowed Esme's car and drove into the city where I emptied my account and bought a used car. I got in and started to drive. I felt something wet on my cheek and swiped it away. One lone drop of venom had fallen from my left eye like a tear. Vampires couldn't cry but the pain and loneliness had forced the venom from my eye. I drove through the day and the next night and just kept driving without stopping for the next three days finally ditching the car and taking a ferry in Alaska to Kodiak. I bought a tiny cabin away from the town and curled up on the bed. I squeezed my eyes shut. The pain in my chest was worse then the burning of the change.

Jasper…

"Where is Bella?" I asked, running into the house, something was wrong, I could feel it. Alice couldn't see her either, not even a foggy shadow of her.

"She borrowed my car to go to Toronto." Esme told me arranging flowers in a vase; "I think she may really be considering attending the university with us. Maybe you should think about it to Jasper."

"When did she leave?"

"A few hours ago, I am sure she'll be back soon."

I waited anxiously, I felt almost hollow, something was wrong I knew it even before I saw Peter's name on my caller display.

"Have you talked to Bella? Has Char? Where is she? What happened?" I spat out in rapid succession, my voice taking on the tone of command.

"I don't know Major but its bad."

"What is?" I demanded.

"Sorry Major but I don't know."

"You're fucking Yoda you have to know!"

"What does Alice see?" Charlotte's voice floated over the phone, she sounded just as worried as Peter.

"Nothin." I spat. "She sees nothin through my Bella's shield. What do you know Peter."

"It's bad Major. Really bad."

"What!" I growled at him. All the Cullen's had entered the living room. They were watchin me intently, their worry over Bella and Sora's fear of my anger so thick I could taste it.

"Wish I knew Major. She wasn't taken, she ain't in trouble exactly but she's, fuck, I don' know. I just know whatever happened its bad and she's hurtin and we need to find her, fast, or… we just need to find her."

I snapped my phone shut crushing it in my hand, "Who spoke to her today?" I demanded.

"I did." Esme's quiet voice was trembling. "She asked where you were and then went upstairs, a little bit later she came down asking to borrow my car to drive into Toronto again."

I ran upstairs and ripped her door from its hinges as I slammed it open. Her room looked no different then it had the day before. I pushed past Carlisle and Emmitt who had entered behind me and raced up to my den. It looked the same as I had left it, all except the little ring in the center of my desk.

I felt a vice grip around my heart and the breath entering my lungs hurt like a thousand needles. I forced myself to walk forward and pick the ring up, a white gold band with a square-cut diamond solitaire. I dropped to my knees as a pain I had never known flowed through me. My mate had left me.

I felt small arms come around me and heard sobbing. I felt another pair of arms wrap around me from the other side, Esme and Rose. Behind us, I heard Alice, "I didn't see, I can't see, why can't I see."

"She left? Why when we would have supported her?" Sora sounded confused and suddenly I knew this had something to do with her, something to do with her and Edward.

I felt rage flow through my veins, pure unadulterated rage. I felt Rose and Esme release me, their dry sobs halting as they inched away from me, trembling a little in fear as I projected my hate, anger and pain.

I was stood in front of her and Edward in an instant. He had pushed her behind him and now stood in a crouch before her, stupid, really stupid, I hit him with a dose of fear that brought him to his knees, his eyes wild and his breathing heavy. Sora cried out and dropped as well.

"What did you do?" I demanded, growling at them. I knew my eyes were darker than the deepest pits of hell.

"Nothing. We did nothing. Stop it. Leave him alone." Sora cried, her tiny hands resting on her mate's back.

"Where is my mate?" I demanded ignoring her and stepping closer pushing more fear and pain into Edward.

"I don't know." He panted. "She wouldn't talk to us. We tried but she wanted to be alone."

"What? What did you try?" I growled.

"To talk to her, to comfort her, that's all. Please let him go. Please. He's your brother." She tried pleading again.

"My mate needed no comfort, had she I would have known and been there. I would have felt it."

"Like you felt her today?" Edward spat through the emotion I was drowning him in.

I growled, stupid, he was really so stupid. I pushed pain into him, filling him with this new and unbearable pain in my chest. He whimpered and I pulled it back a little. "Tell me, now!" I demanded.

"She was upset, snuck out into the woods. I followed to talk to her. Sora followed me a moment later. We tried to get her to talk to us but she refused."

"She would not speak about you with us since our dislike had been made known to her." Sora added huddling nearer to her mate to comfort him and seek comfort from him in the face of such fear.

"Tell me what was said!" I demanded again.

"Nothing." She cried. "I apologized for my earlier words. She accepted and asked to be alone."

"Yet you are certain she was upset over Jasper?" Rosalie stepped closer; I could tell she was afraid, the fear and hate I projected was being sent in smaller doses to all in the room.

"I asked if she was upset by the time he was spending with Alice."

I growled at Edward.

"She said she trusted her mate." Sora hurried to add. "I was surprised she did not mind you were still married since she had mentioned plans to marry you. She said her relationship with you was not our concern and she wished to be alone. We respected her wish."

I growled as a fresh wave of pain washed through me sending out all my rage, fear, pain and loss. It brought all my family to their knees. I felt something inside of me snap.

I spun on Alice. "How did you not see this witch?"

"Jasper." She whispered through her fear, shaking her head.

"Where is she?" I demanded, stepping closer to her now. I could see her body shaking from the fear, her eyes wild and full with venom.

She shook her head and wailed, "I can't see. Please, I can't see."

I cried out all my rage and my family cowered around me. I turned and ran from it all. I ran through the night leaving a trail of bodies in my wake. When I could drink no more I curled on the forest floor and let the pain consume me.

Time had no meaning, daylight came and went, as I lay on the ground. Eventually Peter found me.

"You left quite a mess Major. Twenty-three bodies, twelve animals, so Carlisle told us when we arrived; he and the rest cleaned it all up, did a good job to, didn't want to get to close to you though. Alice is still shaken, she just keeps rockin back n forth sittin on the floor tryin to get a vision. Esme is sobbin. Carlisle asked Edward and Sora to leave for a little while. Rose and Emmett are hacking into every database they can to find her, just a matter of time really. Could use you though Major. Not doin much good out here in the woods."

"She left me." I looked up at my oldest friend, my brother and opened up the gates of pain for him to feel.

"She's hurtin Major, that's all but we'll find her."

"What in the hell you are still married to that damn Pixie for is beyond me." Char spat sitting cross-legged beside and a little behind her husband.

"I didn't think about it." I told her honestly. "Out there at the cabin. She was right, before I changed her she said we were living in a bubble, we were. I didn't think about anythin else really. After I turned her, we stopped talking to the Cullen's, even forgot about James."

"And when you got here it changed?" Peter prodded.

"Life caught up with us."

"You mean the Pixie got her claws in you."

"I mean that we both spent time with people we had not seen for three years, our family."

"You haven't been apart from her for more than twelve hours since those three days you hid from her in the woods before you even knew she was your mate. You came here and abandoned her." Charlotte hissed. I growled at her but she continued, "You abandoned her, your mate and fiancé for your wife! Who you couldn't be bothered to divorce! After three years!"

"Enough!" Peter snapped at her, "Char go back to the house."

I knew my eyes were going black again with the rage.

"No." She spat at him before turning back to me, "Get up off your ass Major and go get my sister back!"

I turned to Peter, "Tell me something. Anything."

He sighed, "We have to find her Major. We have to find her soon."

"She's in danger? How? From who? Where is she? Give me something! Anything!"

"Wish I could Major. All this Yoda shit is giving me is bad vibes, real bad vibes. All my senses are screaming to find her, fast."

I followed them back to the house. Esme wrapped me in her arms. When she let me go, I looked over at Emmett.

"Give me something Em. A train ticket, a credit card transaction, anything."

"She only has the id with McCarty?" I nodded. "Then I got nothing."

"Nothing?"

"All her accounts were emptied out the day she left. There are no records of her on any public transport."

"So she ran." Char said. "She'll be on the continent then."

"Or bought a car but yes chances are she is on the continent."

"Where would she have gone?" Esme asked us.

"Fuck if we knew that we wouldn't be here." Charlotte spat at her, the stress and worry getting to her.

Esme looked at me. I shrugged, "To Char. If there was anything she went to Char."

Char started sobbing, "I should have been here. The house could have waited." Peter pulled her into his arms to comfort her.

"Where is Alice?" I demanded.

"I can't see her. I tried. Jazz, I've been trying. Please. I'm sorry. This wasn't supposed to happen. I don't understand, I could always see her. The images were a bit fuzzy but I could see her. Now its black, there is nothing." She was sobbing.

I felt the pain and anger growing. Now it was mixed with fear for her.

"She's a shield, we always thought she subconsciously let you through, believing you were looking out for her." Peter said still gently rubbing Charlotte's back.

"I was, I am. I love her."

"Looking out for her!" Charlotte spun out of his arms, raging. "YOU BITCH! This is all because of YOU! My sister is hurt and ran because of YOU! Tell me, huh, when did your visions stop? Did you really not see this happening?"

Alice was sobbing again, "No. I would never hurt Bella."

"Why did you call her here? WHY?" Charlotte demanded shouting.

"I MISSED MY SISTER!" Alice shouted back. "Three years! Three years I waited to see her! I did everything I did for her, to keep her safe, to make sure she and Jasper found their way to each other! I would never hurt her! I saw when I left Europe that I would see her again. I was anxious for it to happen. I called her here now because I saw you were moving and it would be a good time! This wasn't supposed to happen! I was going to divorce Jasper and we were all going to have a nice visit. The Cullen's would be so happy to see them. I knew Edward would be upset she was turned but he had Sora so I was sure he'd let it go after the initial shock. The choices weren't made yet. I can only see so much! It was going to be a good visit, that's all. I didn't know she was upset. Didn't know that there was anything to be watching for!" she turned to me, "That's your job! You're the empath!"

"I can't feel Bella. Not unless she is broadcasting to me."

"Yeah, they talk like that, its fucking weird." Peter added. I rolled my eyes, so not helpful right now.

"So she's blocking Alice. Using cash and no one has any fucking clue where she might've gone?" Carlisle interrupted us.

"Home?" Rose asked, "Would she have gone back to Forks? Or Phoenix?"

"Bella Swan died three years ago. There is nothing for her to go back to." Peter reminded her.

"Yeah but she might go back to the area." Emmett suggested.

"No." Peter said.

"Are you sure?" I asked him hoping he was finally getting something.

"Yes. I don't know where she is but it isn't there."

"Garrett?"

"Char?" Peter asked her.

"He's the only other vampire she knows."

"I don't think she went to him, he'd have called us." Peter told her.

He didn't sound as sure as he had when he said she wasn't in Phoenix or Forks, so I pulled out my phone and called Garrett.

"Jasper?" His voice came over the phone on the second ring.

"Do you have Bella?"

"Bella's missing?" he sounded truly concerned and a fresh wave of pain filled me. "Since when? From where? Can I help?"

"Since…" I looked over at my family.

"Four days." Rose said quietly.

"We're in Canada, near Toronto." I told him.

"I can come and help you look. What about Alice? Has she had any visions? Do you know where she might have gone?"

"Alice can't see her. We hoped you might tell us."

"Char. Those two are always together, like twins. I'd say you already called her though."

"We're here." Peter spoke up.

"Shit. Um, well, she always wanted to go to Europe. Have Emmett look at plane tickets."

"No. She hasn't left the country or used a credit card." Emmett told him.

"Shit, well, I'd say Alaska. We talked about going there last time I was around. Lots of rural locations and a couple big cities to visit for the odd indulgence of proper feeding, I remember because I asked her if she didn't want to live in a more populated area since she'd been hidden away for three years. She said she was happy to visit New York for the odd weekend but loved her paradise. She said she wanted to find a place she could have to hide away at. A place she would never have to hide who she was or leave because of not aging. I told her about Alaska and the North West Territories. She said she'd like Alaska, would like to see the Northern Lights."

I remembered her saying that when we were reading one night. That Alaska would be a good place to live.

I was out the door in a second, the cell phone crashing to the floor; I didn't even bother to hang up. I could hear the others running behind me. I had to find my mate. How I wasn't sure but Alaska sounded like a good fucking place to start.

Bella…

I wasn't sure of time passing, I just lay on the cot staring at the white of the wall as the light came and went across it. Jasper and Alice still married. Did he still love her? Was I only to pass the time? No. I was his mate. He was mine and I was his. So why did he disappear with her so fast? Why did he hide the fact that he was still married? Why hadn't they divorced? Alice had left Jasper; if she wanted him back, maybe, he would be only too happy, he had not after all wanted to leave her.

I forced the thoughts out of my vast mind, focusing back on the white wall and the texture of the paint. I emptied my mind and let the pain within me carry me away.

Jasper…

We made it to the Denali's and they began to help us search but my Bella had just disappeared. Days turned to weeks and she had now been gone a full month. No matter how much I fed my eyes stayed pitch black, I felt a pain in my heart greater than the burn and a pressure on my chest that made me feel like I was in a vice.

"We have to find her." Peter repeated the same thing he had been saying since she had disappeared, his voice becoming more desperate.

"Where? Can't you Yoda something more fucking useful? I know I have to find her! I know she is hurting! I fucking feel it!" I snapped at him. My fuse was all but nonexistent these days. I could not be in the same room as Alice without growling at her, my anger, pain and fear rolling off in waves. Char could not be near her either and had attacked her more than once. My sister could barely look at me either. She hated to see me suffer but couldn't help the anger and disgust that flowed to me at the same time. Everyone was scared and upset.

It was five and a half weeks before we got the hint of a break. A nomad who knew Eleazar called with news of a vampire he came across on an island.

"Jasper!"

"Tanya?"

"A nomad we know called. We think he's with Bella!"

I was by her side in less than a second, we all were.

I growled at Eleazar, "Who is he? Where is she?" I demanded.

"He is an old friend I met before settling here. An English vampire named Ian, who spends a few years travelling in Canada and Alaska sometimes. He says he came across a cabin on an island, inside was a vampire, a young girl, she lies on a bed without moving or acknowledging anything. He says there is a shimmering field around her and he cannot touch her, it sort of pulses when he tries. I'm not sure if your Bella can do that but I had him describe her, long chestnut hair, high cheekbones, full lips, eyes blacker than pitch. He says she hasn't so much as twitched in the two days he's been there."

"Where?" I demanded. The demon god of war was in charge of me now, had been in charge since I had learned she'd left me, they all leaked fear and anxiety near me now and it only fueled my own anxiety and anger.

"Kodiak." I was out the door at the last syllable, my family at my heals.

When we reached the island I could still feel nothing from her, it was more than not just feeling her emotions, I could not feel even the slightest twitch coming from the mate pull, it was like she had somehow severed the bond.

The nomad caught our scent quickly and came to meet us.

"Eleazar" he nodded, eyeing me warily.

"Ian," Eleazar nodded back, "the girl, Bella, where is she?"

His eyes went to me and back to Eleazar, "She's not in a good way Eli. You sure it's a good idea all you going there."

I growled and he dropped to his knees, panting through the wave of fear and pain, "Where is my mate?" I demanded.

"Two miles west, not far from the water." He panted out. I took off running, when I finally caught her sweet scent a burst of speed sent me tearing through the door, ripping it from the hinges as it slammed into the drywall behind it.

"Bella!" I cried out as I saw her lying on the thin cot over the worn and frayed mattress. She didn't move or acknowledge me, didn't even blink.

I moved slowly over to her and gently reached my hand to her shoulder, it was stopped by a shimmering barrier about five inches from her skin. I spun around in a crouch, growling when I sensed intruders enter the room. I vaguely recognized them as family and sent them another warning growl. They backed out of the cabin.

"Bella? Baby, please, let me in." She didn't move. I pushed against the barrier and it seemed to pulse and then push out at me. "Bella." I sobbed to her, then I raged, I could feel the fear of the vampires outside but still she did not stir, I broke down again.

Finally, I sat with my back resting against the cot, my head in my hands. I did not look up as Charlotte and Peter came in, they stayed on the opposite side of the room though, giving me space.

"Tell me something Peter." All rage had left me now; my voice was broken.

He sighed, "The Pixie can't see anything here, Bella is blocking her visions entirely."

I let out a low growl, "About Bella Peter. Tell me how to reach her. What do I do? I cannot even touch her."

"Talk to her." Charlotte's voice was a quivering whisper.

I leaned my head back and began talking. I told her how much I loved her, I explained about the divorce, about simply not thinking about it. I told her all of my favorite moments with her, all of the things I loved about her and still there was nothing. She just stared sightlessly at the wall, blocking me from feeling her or even touching her perfect porcelain skin. I bowed my head and dry sobbed, letting the pain wash over me as I fully broke down.

I heard Charlotte and then Peter talking to her, hours passed and slowly each member of the family got their turn to speak to her. Hours passed and she never moved, I wondered at the last time she ate. Carlisle had already thought of it and he and Emmett brought back an animal, the smell of the blood made her eyes an impossible shade darker but still she didn't so much as twitch. He went so far as suggesting bringing a human. I had never thought to hear anything remotely close to that coming out of his mouth but not even the shock could overcome the pain and grief I felt sat beside that cot.

On the third day, Edward and Sora arrived. I had laid my head back and started singing to her. I began with the songs I used to sing my sister to sleep with, the songs I had first sung for my Bella. I sang love songs and sad songs and beneath my eyelids, I saw her smiling face.

"What's wrong with her?" I heard Sora's voice and growled low.

"He did this to her. He broke her. I new he would. He's not good enough for her. Come now Carlisle, you must see, he is a danger, not only to people but to Bella. He's a monster." I growled and sent out waves of pain and fear. "He's here?" Edward sounded surprised.

_Can't you hear me Eddie boy?_ I thought and heard him growl. _Losing your touch_? I thought to him again and he growled. I dropped him with a burst of fear.

"He stole her from us Carlisle, you should see the thoughts in his head. He is worse than a monster!"

I could feel his anger, his fear and underlying it was his jealousy. _Do you know we were only gone a few hours when I first felt her lust for me,_ _it was nothing compared to the wave she sent me when we went shopping and she saw me shirtless. I was hard for hours after that happy blast of emotion. Not that I needed to be an empath just then, the smell of her desire was enough to make me have to fight not to push her against the wall and take her. You know I think the scars turned her on. She's definitely spent enough time kissing and licking over every single one._ I heard him growl and reveled in the new torture as I recounted every time we had made love. I didn't even realize when I stopped thinking about making love to her and started actually talking about the taste of her creamy skin and the sound of her moans, the feel of her heat wrapped around me or her nails digging into my back as she screamed my name. I told him how perfect she was. How I found it difficult to ever let her up and out of my bed, only able to because I knew that she would pull me into the little enclave we found behind the waterfall to make love, or bend over a fallen tree branch so I could take her from behind. I recounted every moment of every time I was with her, I had long since stopped trying to torture him, now I was torturing myself as I remembered them all and recounted them to her, my mate. I told her how perfect she was, how much I needed her. I couldn't live without her; I had never been able to live without her, before I existed, going through the motions of life, part of me always locked away. I was only me, with her. I started to sing to her again, I sang her our song, Me and You.

"I need you Bella. Please. Let me in. I love you."

"I love you to Cowboy." Her voice was a hoarse whisper and if the others hadn't gasped in shock and stepped closer to us, I might have thought I imagined it.

"Darlin?" I reached a hand out to her afraid the shimmering barrier would keep me from her but she reached her hand out and took mine. I bent my head so it touched hers still held in mine and dry sobbed; I had really thought I had lost her. I felt a wave of love wash over me, on its heals was lust and I lifted my head to look in her eyes. She pushed more lust at me and I leaned in to kiss her. After a minute, I heard a throat cleared in the background and let out one long low and dangerous growl. I heard them retreating from the building. I gently pulled my mate into my arms and kissed her. I worshipped her as I made love to her, pouring all of my love into her, all of the sadness and fear and pain we had both felt was mingled together as we clung to each other.

Hours later I held her in my arms, afraid to let her go. "You left me."

"You left me first."

Both of our voices were broken whispers.

"Never."

I could feel the pain and sadness flow out of her and into me, "You and Alice are still married."

"We were getting divorced. It's why we kept leaving together. It was something I should have done before your change. Honestly, I didn't think about it. Alice and I were over from the moment you and I left that hotel. She is my friend, she was my companion for many years and I loved her." I felt a fresh wave of sadness from her, "It does not compare to loving you. I love you with every fiber of my being, the human, the vampire, the God of War. Never have I loved or thought to love so completely."

I knew my pain and sadness were washing into her as I spoke and I felt her sending me calm, acceptance and love.

"It hurt." I heard her voice break with the pain pouring off her into me. "Even when you came back from hunting with her that first night, I felt the loss of you, you were sitting next to me but I still felt the loneliness and fear as when you are gone.

I sent her a fresh wave of love. "She had reminded me we never officially divorced. I could not believe I had forgotten it. I was ashamed." I admitted to her sending her the emotion. She said nothing, sending me acceptance and love.

I still felt the sadness in her so I added a dose of comfort to the love I was projecting. Then I added how sorry I was to have hurt her.

She sent me love and forgiveness, and her own sorrow at having run. The emotions played between us as we kissed, expressing our pain, fear and love while comforting each other.

It was beginning to be light again when I heard movement coming to the cabin. It was Peter and Char. I was under control again and felt bad as I saw them slowly enter, cautiously watching us in submissive postures. I could feel the love and concern radiating off them in tidal waves and shared it with my mate. She twisted in my arms to look at them while still holding me.

I sent them the love and sorrow she was feeling as she spoke, "I'm sorry."

Charlotte broke down in sobs and stepped closer to us. Peter held her back, still watching me carefully. I looked him in the eyes and sent him calm and relaxation. He nodded and let his mate come to us following behind her.

"Good to have you back Major."

I felt a wave of confusion from Bella and looked away in shame. She forced my eyes back to hers sending me love and comfort.

"I went a little loco after you disappeared." I admitted.

"A little?" Charlotte scoffed, "He's been in full out God of War rampage. Alice hasn't stopped shaking since he unleashed on her. We've all been trembling in his presence from the levels of fear and pain her was throwing off in his anger."

"I do not tremble." Peter sniffed. "He was pretty scary though Little Bit so maybe don't do that again ok."

"Does he have other wives to surprise me with?" she sent our brother a small smile all the while sending me calm, acceptance and love. She never turned away from my darker side, she was not afraid of me.

"No, just Alice." I told her, as she smiled at my relief.

"Maybe you two should put some clothes on. The Cullen's are coming back now." Charlotte suggested. She and Peter left to give us privacy. It was hard to let my mate out of my arms long enough for us both to dress and I immediately had her sat in my lap on the bed.

I breathed in her scent as the family slowly came in, fear, sadness, desperation and love pouring off all of them.

They hugged us together as she seemed as loath as me to let go. Alice was still standing back, looking at us both with heart breaking sadness and I was filled with shame and sadness for how I had terrorized her in my anger and pain.

Bella…

I heard his voice as he sang to me and then I heard Sora and Edward, and I wanted to rage at them, my mate was not a monster! I had no energy though and their voices faded. I could feel the emotions pouring off Jasper, love, sadness, fear, pain, loss; he was drowning in them. With Edward's voice came a flare of anger and then smugness, I understood the emotions as he began to speak his thoughts aloud, his love for me, his every memory of me, making love to me. Then he sang our song and each note filled me with love and hope. When it came to the end, he whispered his love of me.

"I love you to Cowboy." I could feel his surprise at my voice; he was not controlling the projection at all; everything he felt was on display for me.

After making love and reassuring each other of our love the others came. First, our sister and brother, I could feel as Jasper projected their emotions to me and mine to them.

When the Cullen's came, Alice held back, trembling still. I pulled away from Jasper and stepped towards her, she looked down at the ground with venom filled eyes. I could feel shame and sadness pouring off my mate and knew he, in his anger, had blamed her.

I hugged her, pushing feelings of love and sorrow that I knew my mate would send her. "I'm sorry Alice." She sobbed brokenly into my shoulder. "All you have done is for us. You let him go so I could be with him. You supported us before we were an us or even thought there could be one. I should never have doubted you."

"I'm so sorry Bella. It wasn't until you said you were getting married I remembered that we were still married. If I had seen it coming I would have been sure the divorce was taken care of."

"I know. I don't know why I feel so hurt when he is near you; it's irrational. I'm so sorry for ever doubting you. Sorry that he blamed you, that he scared you, but I know he would never hurt you Alice. He loves you. I love you."

"I'm not you Bella. He has always scared me a little. When that side of him comes out, it terrifies me. He blamed me because he was afraid of losing you. When it comes to you he would destroy me for making you hurt, his love for you is beyond anything else. He was right to blame me anyways, I should have seen, should have remembered, I'm sorry. I love him and I love you so very much. I would never do anything to hurt either of you. I have missed you both so much. I was used to spending so much time with him and I didn't think how it would be for you. I just thought you would be so happy to be with the whole family and you and I could have our own time after I got the divorce settled, then we could plan your wedding."

I hugged her tighter to me, "I love you Alice. I'm sorry. I don't know why it hurts so much. I know you would never try to take him from me."

"No one ever could." She whispered back. "You are his very life and soul." We hugged for a while longer and when Jasper stepped forward to take me in his arms again, I motioned him to hug her, to smooth things over.

I knew he held back, he would never do anything to make me uncomfortable let alone to hurt me, I don't know how I ever feared anything from these two whom I loved and trusted so thoroughly. I sent him a wave of comfort, confidence and reassurance. As always he understood the cocktail of emotions and pulled Alice into a hug.

"I'm sorry Ali. I was hurtin so much and so afraid I'd lost her."

"I know Jazzy. I'm so sorry I didn't see it."

"You can't see everythin. I'd never expect ya to. I was just to afraid to even see straight."

He kissed her forehead and stepped back, pulling me into his arms again, as though he was afraid to have me to far away from him. I knew it would be like this for a while to come. This need to see and touch each other all the time to reassure ourselves we were together and both ok.

I turned to the other two who stood in the doorway. I heard a growl spill out of Jasper and his arms tightened as I attempted to step nearer to Edward and his mate. I could feel anger, jealousy and fear pouring out of him as he projected fear into them.

I turned in his arms and pulled his head down so his eyes met mine. I sent him love, devotion, pride, comfort and a little lust, it was an emotion always just under the surface when I looked at him.

He sent me back a wave of love tinged with desire, devotion and possessiveness and I knew he felt some of what I felt with him and Alice when he thought of Edward and I. It might have been better because Edward had his mate, or because I did not attempt to spend time with him but whatever the reason for it being less intense it was still very much there for him.

I sent him the same wave of emotions again and kissed him gently before turning in his arms again to face Edward and his mate.

"Jasper is my mate. If you try to come between us again I will not stop the Major from tearing you apart." I narrowed my eyes at Edward, "You tell your wife he is a monster but are to arrogant or stupid to fear him as you ought. I cared about you once and I'm grateful that through you I gained a family in the Cullen's and met my perfect mate. Jasper is not a monster, he did not steal me away, if you attack him again you will answer to me, understand." The dangerous growl of my darkest depths came out and I saw Sora shiver, my attention turned to her, "My diet makes me stronger and faster than you, I have been trained to fight by my mate, his Captain and my sister. I have taken out Emmett and can and will take out you."

Edward let out a growl and I felt Jasper tense and let out a warning of his own as I continued, "Its not a threat Edward, just a warning. You know he is dangerous, you've said it to me all the time I have known you; you should heed your own warnings and remember that I'm dangerous now to. If you ever attempt to come between my mate and I again, it would be your last mistake."

"You should hunt Bella." I nodded to Carlisle, he was right, I had never felt my throat burn this way. "Neither of you has been feeding properly." Or at all in my case. "Why don't we meet back at the house in a few days? That will give you and Jazz some time and we can try this reunion over again." I sent him a smile and nod and knew Jazz was sending him our gratitude.

We took just over a week to return. Taking our time, stopping to hunt and make love and just talk.

The reunion went just as Alice had envisioned it this time. She and Jasper finalized their divorce and she, Rose, Char, Esme and I began to discuss what I wanted for my and Jazz's wedding. I reconnected with all of them and Edward and I built a fragile friendship, under the jealous and watchful eye of my mate who was also very conscious of the time he spent with Alice and how close they were when together. They both always made me feel included. I formed a tentative friendship with Sora and invited her to help with wedding plans. I was warming up to the young geisha who was also warming up to Jasper and I, though still cautious about being to near us or alone with one or both of us. She was always very near to Edward's side. Alice and I reconnected and by the time we left six months later she and I were as close as ever and I no longer felt threatened by her, Jazz was still careful that I did not feel remotely uncomfortable when he was with her but the pain, loneliness and fear were all but gone.

The wedding was intimate and elegant and exactly what we wanted. Saying goodbye was hard as we were not just going on our honeymoon but would be joining Char and Peter at our new home.

Alice met her mate the following year and it was as if my fears of her and Jasper had never existed. I was happy to see them together. I knew they still loved each other and I was happy for them. I loved Alice and all the Cullen's as well.

When the time came the Whitlock and Cullen families ended up moving to Canada together with houses next to each other, well as next to each other as they could get surrounded by acres of forest. Life had settled into a happy routine. Jasper and I had our beautiful life together, the future Alice had seen so long ago.


End file.
